A Walk Inside My Mind

What you made me feel

E͏̫̜̗͇̦r̝̲̠̻͍̫͍̕ŗ̠̦̜̱̳͚̪̱͉́͠o̡͔̦̱̬̳͞r͈̫̀͝ ̬̤̘̥̻̖̝̪͝͞4͓̯̯̕0̪̥͕͝4͏̟̤̤:̬͎̻͡
͘҉͈̖̗T͜͏̣̠͎͕͢h̤̮̻̜̘͎̕͜͡i̢̢̖̺̭̗̗̲̮ş҉͓̝͍̼͍ ̱̜̭̮̀t̞͉͓ę̪̣̹͡x̼̪͜͠t̢̰̤̗̭̯̗̘͜ ̷͍͕̪̳̞̀͠n̵̯̩ǫ̴҉̻͙̜̝̠͎͎ ̷̧̲̫͕͘ļ͔̣͟͝o̦̟̝ǹ̷̡̪g̡̬͎͇͜e̵͇̱r̦͖̙͡ ͏͎͕̗̪̘̗̭̜e̤͓̼͕̳x̖̺̼͕͖͢͠į̧̨̞ͅs̬͙̯̫̼̀͟t̨͚͔͜͝s̙
̙̥ͅͅa͔͔͔̰͔n͉̯̞͉͉̱͙͝ͅd̰͡ ̴̲̗̫͜h̛̫̣̬̼͉͙̭a̵̡̗̭͎̤d͚͍̥͓̥̰̹̹̪́̕͞ ҉͏̳͘b͙̜̹̙̞͚̙e̝̼̯̖͓͇͡ẹ̖̫͚̖̖n̰̤͠ ̞̝̮͖̪͢d̵̘̝̻̟̰̱͢e҉̴̼̫̺̼̬̼̮l͏͎̱̳̬̬̳̜͠ȩ̼̟̼̮̗̰̬t͏̸̣̗̥̜e҉͠͏̹̜͈ḓ̷͎̼̗̭̬̻́ ̗̝͇̩͉͙̱̬ͅd̼̜̺̱͝u̙̤̺͈e̡̠̝͞ ̡̠̥̠͡t͞҉̥̼̣͓̟̣̙̦ò̵̡̱̰̠̳͙ ̯̕͢
̹̝̖̙͉̣̭t̺͍̘̼͇̫̰̬́͜h̤̻̘̜́e҉̬̱̮͙̹̜ͅ ͚̮̳̪͚̼̀̀f̡̟͠o̹̦̠̩͢͞͡l̝̠̞͜l̸̟̯̲̖̳̦͙͎o͙̞̫̦̳̜̥͎w̴̺̫̤̜̰̟̠i̶̫̲̘̹n̛̼̻͕͕̝͜g̝͔̤̥ ̸̪̞͍̼͉͓̦̥͜͝r̴̘̰̗̬͚͝ͅe̢͙̼̟̭̲͈̜a̶̝̰͟ş̵̧̱̱̥o̫͞͡ǹ̵̛̹̹̠̻̦̜̦̼s̷̖͎̘̦:̵̳̙̞
̴̧͓̥͢
̶̡̖D̡͓̗͝i̴͍͎͢ḛ̱͇̙̬̝̖͜ͅ
̱̟͢
̹̖̹̳̲̣̹͞͡Y҉̨̝̺̮̲́ǫ̵̛͍͓̺̪u̧̡͖̝̘̩̟͇͖͟ ̛̦͈̳͠ͅm͔͎̗͕͈͚͘͝u̘̬̕s̯͕̬̫̝̲̘͇t̢̢̥̗̱̫̯́ ̯̲̪̼͔̠̥͘d͙̯̣̰̮̩͢i͙̮̦̹͇̺̺̩̬e̵̗͖̩͕̜̺͟
̸̧̯̟̖̳̥̠̤̜͡
͖̪̟̺̟̭̼ͅY̵̘͙͔͓͍̗o̝̪̝̳̗͢u͝҉̵̣̮̖ ̨̛̬͎̥̻͈̙̥̜͡h͖̞͉͔̥͉͈a̷̧̩͚̪͚͇̬͡v̱̼e̱͇͈ ̴̝̯̺t͠͏̥̮o͏̘̹̩͚̖̟̖͖͠
̦̭̤́͠
̷̯̳̦̜̹̯͘Ǵ͏̞̭͇ȩ̱̼͡t̬͙̰͈̦̟̞͓̫ ̵̟̯͘͟o̧͎̰͜ͅu̴̲̤͎̰ͅt̡̰͔̥͢ ̵̥͇̘̱͚̪̺ọ͓̰͓̜̯̜̘f̶̨͔̱̬̝͍́ ͉̖̱̯̩̪͚͞m̴̯̣̹͉̤̭̬̝̦y̶̴̪͉͝ ̴̢̼̥̻̪͙̜̺͉͢b̶̡̨̮͇ó̡͏̲͉͍͙͎d̥̤̥̖̦͔̼̤̣͜y͎̪̥̰͕̰͔
̗̹̟̰̪͔͚͇
̨̠͢G̷̛̳̀e̘̺̩̖͘t̥̭͔̰̞̣́͢ ̧̳̫̻͠o͏̴͔̥͜ͅu̵̶̘͇̯͔̗̘͎t̴͙̺̙̙̥̤͜ ̟̺̘o̰̹̭f͉̱̘̺̥͎̠͡͞ ̶͈̘̤̘͙͉͚͔͝m̺̲̝̬͉̣͢y̼̱͠ ̯̰͍̹ͅm͖̪̜̀͘͜ị̤͕̣̝̙̕͟n̵̯͙͔̥̩͉̼ͅd̸̻̮
҉̘̼̳̺̯̗
̵͇͉̖L͞͏̱̲̖͔e̮̪͇̬̙͉͕͖͜͢á̢̝̩̺̭̺̟͞v̝͙̤͢͝e̶͔̘͓̝͓͘ ̴̭̻͔m͖̦̘̩e͉̪ ͖̺̗̯̺̖̜l̟̠̦̦̜e̻̯a̴̺͚͠v͢͏̫͉͉͚͕͙e̡̡̱͚͙̫̱̯̫̦̦ ̵͕͇͖m͍̳̘̟͕͍͘e̢̬͠ ̗̻̣̙̰̕l̶̛̜ͅe̩̖͎͍̙͎̝̥̕a̢̻̰̩͕̞̲͜v̧̱̘͔̗̲̦̩ȩ̧͙̣̹͙͓̪ ҉͓̥͔̰͍͎̹ͅm͜͏͕͚͓̳e͕͠ ̭l̵̖̱͖̦͍̼̰e̬͡a̲̝v̠͜͜ę͈̹̹͜͢ ̹͉̘̀̕n̡̙̟̞̳̪͇̼e͏̡̜̠̮͕

You make me want to just disappear
You just like to see my pain
How much longer until you win?

I don't know

All I feel is the blade against my wrist
And the pills I must ingest
How much longer until it works
How much longer until I

ꀸꀤꍟ

Until it just reaches to the end
Let me grab a hold onto it
And let it begin
The timer is ticking and telling me
To go
I have nothing more to strive for
And I want nothing less
I just want to take that blade and
Stick it through my ribs

Let me die
Let me die today
Let me die

Don't try to stop the inevitable, just let it go

I won't ever forget you as I head
The living say

"It wasn't your fault, and her actions were selfish. Don't worry, Okay? It couldn't possibly be your fault."

And at that point I know

Nobody ever pays attention.

I am not going to sugar coat this
Because I know despite it you
Would tell me
"death is not the answer"
And something else cliché

I don't want to listen to your
Pleads and your words
Just stop and pay attention
Because here is a show

Watch my body swing across
In a tight rope
Or
Touch as my body is covered
In thousand cut blood

Just listen and hear the crying
And call me a weak whore
Whatever you want,
Just as long as you let me

ꀸꀤꍟ

You never cared, and if you did...

I don't feel it.

Why must you just... Treat me like
I am some form of rubbish

I looked up to you and in return
You hurt me

I can't do my work
I can't do my art
I can't do anything
Because
It is never right

They always want perfection
And they always want motivation
But what part of motivation involves
So much death just to

Ｅｓｃａｐｅ

And I will be that demonstration