Homeless guy on my couch: CHARLIE
Cadbury: would love to talk but I've already had my fair share of banging my head against a wall today
Homeless guy who has finally left my couch: what? Why were you
Homeless guy who has finally left my couch: whatever I don't care I have a crisis.
Cadbury: What do you want
Homeless guy who has finally left my couch: idkk
Cadbury: you're wasting my time
Homeless guy who has finally left my couch: no it's just Cas has been acting kinda weird I guess and something that sam said won't stop bugging me and it kind of makes sense actually if you pair it with the way cas is acting
Cadbury: okay has he been possessed or what
Homeless guy who needs to leave my life: no it's nothing like that he um this is rly awkward are you really going to make me say it
Cadbury: spit it out squid boy
Annoying bitch: I think cas is in love with me ok
Annoying bitch: and it's really weird
Cadbury: ew what
Annoying bitch: ok he's not that bad
Cadbury: no I'm saying ew at the thought of anybody liking you
Homo in denial: oh wow charlie, ever the comic genius. This is serious. What if he does like me.. I'm not gay! This'll totally ruin our friendship. Cas is my best pal. My brother from another mother. Actually I don't think he has a mother. Unless god did it with his sister.. ok gross how did I get here
Cadbury: okay first of all, I'm very worried about you, please see a therapist. Secondly, why are you so panicked about this, to tell you the truth I kinda just assumed you two were a thing anyway. I mean you talk about him all the time.
Homo in denial : no I don't we're best friends. Of course I talk about him a little bit.
Cadbury: ok well all you keep doing is saying "we're best friends" who you trying to convince deano? Me or yourself?
Defo homo in denial: don't be so fucking extra charlie you're a hacker not some Hollywood life guru.
Cadbury: and now you're getting defensive...
Defo homo in denial: I am not it's just you're meant to be helping me and instead you're telling me I have feelings for cas
Cadbury: well maybe that's how I can help, by making you think about your feelings for cas
Defo homo in denial: no! There is no feelings for cas! You're useless I need to talk to someone else about this
Cadbury: you don't have any other friends.
