Happily ever after....

Part 6: And finally, clarity... (Last chapter, folks)

A/N: Thank you all for taking the time out to read and vote on the previous part! Appreciate your time. And special thanks for the comments that really, really make writing this so worthwhile. On to the last part...

Previously:

Sona's logical brain told her all of this; her heart knew better- it had deciphered the underlying truth in Dev's words. He HAD loved her so much that he could never love that way again, he could not even love her, Sona, that same way again. It was at that moment that it dawned on her that Dev HAD moved on. Truly, completely, irrevocably. She had lost her first love, forever, and the realization brought tears to her eyes.

Dev flinched seeing the tears track down her cheeks. He still couldn't handle seeing her upset but there was nothing he could about it. He quietly waited while she composed herself.

Completely embarrassed about her breakdown, yet quite unable to do anything about it, Sona closed her eyes tightly and just let the tears flow until some of the killing weight lifted off her heart.

"Do you ..... Are you still angry with me, Dev? I did not believe you when you told me about the prenup and eviction? Do you...", she hesitated to put it into words, not wanting to hear 'Yes' for an answer, and then steeled herself, "Do you blame me for our breakup?". There she had put it in words, the fear that had been plaguing her since the minute she came to know the truth yesterday, the guilt that had been gnawing at her insides.

"No", came the immediate, firm response, causing her to look up in surprise. She gazed into hazel depths and found nothing but honesty there. "No, I never blamed you for not believing me, Dr. Bose . How could I?? I had not given you any reason to believe me, to trust me completely, had I?? I hid the truth about your pregnancy issues, Dr. Bose. I had no right to do that, yet I hid it. After that, how could I expect you to trust me fully?", he paused and then looked down.

A moment later, he went on, his tone softer, "But it hurt. Not that you did not trust me, I dug the grave for your trust in me with my own two hands. I understood that you could not trust me but it hurt that you so easily believed I would put money above you, that you thought I could USE wealth... property... to throw you, your family out on the street... Why did you believe that, Dr. Bose? I know I had lied to you before, hidden something huge. But when did I ever do something like that, when had I ever been willing to erode your trust in me gain something for MYSELF, to protect my WEALTH?? How did you think I could even consider doing that?? Didn't you know I had nothing more valuable than our relationship? Didn't you know ME?", his tone was not accusatory. He was actually asking her, he wanted to know, he wanted to understand.

But Sona did not have the answer either. The truth was that she knew as well as he did that he valued her and their relationship above everything else he had. He had hidden the truth about her infertility and that had hurt deeply but the reason she had not left him then was that she knew he had never intended to hurt her.

In fact, in his mind, with his skewed and very, very faulty logic he had been trying to make things better for her, make her a part of his life, his family in a more complete way. Knowing that, she could not bring herself to leave him even after knowing the truth.

Now she wondered, when she had been able to think so clearly, see beyond that stupendously hurtful act of his to the intent hidden deep underneath, why had she been unable to do that, that day at the farmhouse? What had skewed her thinking, blinded her and made Dev's pleas fall on her deaf ears.

And then she realized, in one blazing moment of clarity that it was the accusation flung at her by Mami, about being a gold digger, that had rendered her blind and deaf. That accusation had hit deep, it had made its way under her skin and refused to go away. Her self- respect and her ego had both taken a thrashing with that accusation that she never truly got over. And that meant it was she who had let money come in between them, not him. And that hurt self respect/ ego was the reason why SHE had never called him during the last 7 years or tried to determine if there was another side to the story that had unfolded that horrible night at the farmhouse.