Sunrise at Midnight | Iljae

Chapter 18 - Just You and Me

*WARNING: Mentions of alcohol and violence*

"Ilhoon, everything will be fine. She is okay- only sleeping." The brunette says softly as he casts his eyes down to Ilhoon's shaking hands.

A warm palm envelopes his frozen ones and Ilhoon locks eyes with the taller male as he squeezes them; in what he believes to be reassurance, - comfort even.

"How do you know though? She was unconscious when I arrived here, who knows what he's done to her?"

Worry floods Sungjae's body as he notices the other boy's eyes start to water. He pulls him back into his chest as he rests his head on his shoulders and rubs soothing circles down his back to try and calm him down.

"You're not alone in this anymore, you have me now. Eunkwang and his brother are downstairs with Jisu as well, and she's not alone either. We will figure this out together, just you and me Ilhoon. You and me."

Somehow, the weight of Sungjae's words run deeper then he thought they would. They provide him with reassurance and comfort, make him feel calm like the younger's intent; but something within Ilhoon seems to spark at his words. They feel different, more intense, just as though they garner another meaning altogether. Ilhoon can't explain it, but he feels it pang in his gut as he tightens his hold on the taller male. A feeling he can't yet understand or describe, but it is definitely there. Maybe after all of this is over he would look into it; try and decipher the strange tingling in his body, but for now- he needs to help Jisu.

Just you and me Ilhoon. You and me.

Ilhoon slowly nods his head in acknowledgement of the younger boy's words. He untangles himself from his tight hold and softly mutters, "We need to figure out what to do with Jisu's father."

The boy doesn't want to have to let go, but he knows that this isn't the time to act upon his strange flutter in his stomach. This is about Jisu and Ilhoon, he can't let his selfishness get in the way of what is more important right now. Though, he isn't stupid- he knows what the accelerated beat of his heart means; understands how it would skip a beat every few seconds when Ilhoon locks his dark brown eyes on him. He understands why he would get goosebumps every time their arms accidentally brush, or when they kiss- even if it isn't for the right reasons, - he knows why his stomach would twist and churn and summersault and jump and leap and flutter.

He knows.

He understands.

But he doesn't acknowledge it. Because that wouldn't be the right thing to do.

It would be inappropriate to think that way while Ilhoon is going through so much at the moment. It would be inappropriate to think that way when Sungjae promised Ilhoon he would do everything he could to help him.

It would be inappropriate, but that doesn't stop him from silently thinking about it.

The truth is, Sungjae is scared. Scared of admission, scared of the truth.

What was the real reason he so desperately wanted to help the shorter boy, who was nothing but a mere stranger in the beginning?

Ilhoon made it clear as day what he wanted when they first started this- whatever this was.

A distraction. A complete and utter distraction from the world and its troubles they held. Nothing more, and nothing less.

So is it wrong of Sungjae to kind of-maybe-sometimes want something more?

Yes.

No.

Yes.

No.