Wishing on the full moon

Ch5

I want something I can't have. I want to be with someone who will never be with me. I like Alex. I know that for sure now. I really, really like him. A lot. Loads. What will I do?

Vampires live forever, unless we are stabbed in the heart with a wooden stick thing. We are meant to be indestructible and yet,  this situation is killing me. I want something I can't have and it's killing me, slowly and painfully. Why is the world like this? Why is it that popular kids can choose whoever they want to be with? Why do people like me only ever end up with others on our level of popularity?  I have never really liked a popular guy so I never really cared about the way this works.......but now I want one of the most popular guys. Maybe even the most popular guy. Tons of other girls like him! Dalia, Vicki and other girls with so much more chance than me. He doesn't even pay any attention to them and they are some of the most popular and most attractive girls. Compare to them, I am nothing but a normal, unattractive girl.

Alex knows these girls like him but he doesn't do anything. He doesn't say no or yes. He just lets them get over it. He doesn't know I like him though, practically no one knows. If this had happened a month ago, they would have all known and would have been running around makimg fun of me. He would know. Now, however, people tend to ignore what goes on with me. Only my friends know anything at all. But they only have suspicions. I haven't told them anything. I keep to myself and only speak to people when necessary - unless they're my friends, my close friends.

Now I sit with them. It's break and we're just sitting down minding our own business.  As usual,  they're talking between themselves and I just stare at the ground. Megs, Ash and Amber just pretend not to notice me. I know they do it because they know that even if they speak to me, I wouldn't really respond . They know I don't like talking. As they laugh, I release a single tear. As I try to rub out the tears, I notice that my friends have stopped talking. I look up to see them looking at me - no, wait - through me.

Alex's POV

Her back is to me. She is looking at the floor, hands rubbing ferociously at her eyes. She notices something is up and looks up at her friends, who are looking at me. She then turns and faces me so I see her face.

Her cheeks and eyes are tinged red. It's not obvious but I can see she's been crying. At the sight of me, her lips stretch into a smile but her eyes are still full of sadness.

"Hey, Alex. What's up?" She squeaks,  failing to hide the weakness in her tone. What's up? What's up?

"What's up is that you love her!" The annoying part of me shouts, "Tell her already!"

I nervously pass my hand through my hair and try to speak.

"Um.......I came to return your Grammar In Action" I finally

gasp.

"Thanks." She sighs as I pass the book to her. Her hands are trembling slightly and she struggles to hold on to the book. She looks up at me and I smile. She tries to smile back and her book falls.

"Sorry." Squeaks quietly. We both reach out for the book and our hands brush slightly. In a split second her eyes widen but before anyone else notices, they return to normal. Nearly normal. It may be a figment of my imagination, but I swear her eyes are......glowing brightly. She blinks quickly and her eyes return to their normal state. Maybe it was a figment of my imagination. Probably.

Lilly's POV

My hand is tingling.  My heart is racing. My stomach is full of butterflies...........no - its full of dragons, flying around and crashing. I can't help but think that I may have a chance......NO! It's just the happiness speaking, just my heart trying to get its own way. My heart has failed many times before so never again will I let it rule.

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Back in the forest after school, laying on the ground, staring into space, silently crying.

"Lilly?" I here Skye say. I quickly turn away and dry my tears but I don't fool Skye.

"Lilly, what's wrong?" He says sitting down by me, "What's going on?"

"Skye, what do you do when you want something you'll never have?" I squeak weakly. He looks at me for a while and then stares ahead, weighing the issue.

"Is this something a someone?" He finally asks, voice tense.

"Yes" I regretfully admit. Skye frowns and looks at me.

"The blond kid?" He asks coldly, "The one you approached as a bat"

I nod. He continues frowning, tense. I hope he doesn't hate me now.

"Lilly?" He says, "The answer to your problem is not with me. If I knew the answer to that, would I be mad now?

I stare down at my palms, crying. Tears water the grass around me.

"Skye...." I start,  looking up but he's gone.