Opening Up

I Need You

They both lay side by side under rumpled covers. They only sound is there heavy breathing and the soft ticking of the clock on the bedside table. Everything had happened so fast that it was blurry. Jackie stares at the ceiling, trying to register everything she had done.

I gave in again.

How could did he do it again? How did she fall for it? She new that Jack had always been her weakness, but she thought she would resist him this time. Once again, she was wrong.

She stares at the ceiling as the wall of silence between them grows. It's Jack who breaks it.

"I guess I've been a pretty shitty husband." He says staring at the ceiling, just like her.

"You're just now realizing that?" She nearly laughs.

He quickly shifts underneath the covers so that he is facing Jackie. "I'm sorry-"

"I know, Jack." She cuts him off.

She sits up, drapes her legs off the bed, and pulls her blouse over her head.  "I think," she awkwardly plays with the sleeves of her blouse. "I might take the kids to Glen Ora."

"You're not coming back to Washington?" Jack says sitting up in confusion. He thought for sure he had been exonerated. At least that's the idea Jackie's moans and kisses had given him. Was she seriously still upset?

"I think I just need more time." She whispers putting a hand on her face.

Jack let's out irritated sigh and lays back down. "I can't keep up with you."

"I'm sorry, but can't you understand that I need time to process this all?" She reasons, turning towards him.

"Well, you didn't need time 20 minutes ago." He rolls his eyes.

Jackie feels pure anger slowly creep it's way back inside of her. Now she really can't believe she let herself become seduced by him. She wasn't going to forgive him that easily again. She needed time to sort everything out; to take into account everything her mother had advised. She knew this irritated Jack, who constantly demanded instant gratification.

If it weren't for John Jr's perfectly timed, blood-curdling toddler scream, Jackie would have unhinged on Jack. Jack should thank his son.

Jackie's maternal instincts kicked into high gear when she heard her son's cries. She jumps from the bed, clad in only panties and her blouse, and races to the source of the noise. The chubby toddler was standing up in his pack n' play in the guest room. He must have been put down for a nap and had a nightmare.

"Oh baby what's wrong? You have a bad dream?" Jackie pouts at the red faced boy. She picks him up and bounces him back and forth, kissing the top of his head. By this point, Jack is standing in the doorway in his boxers and undershirt. "What's wrong with my boy?" He says ruffling the child's hair. John shines his few teeth at his father and opens his arms. "Here," Jackie hands Jack the toddler making eye contact with him.

She stares at her husband as he tenderly whispers to his son. A smile tugs on her lips. This is why she loved this man; he was soft deep down. They needed to fight for their marriage. It wasn't for themselves, it was for the children.

Just then, Janet enters the room. "Oh, you two rest! I'll get the little boy off to sleep!" She says waving her hands. Jack hands John to Janet and leaves the room. As Jackie begins to follow him, Janet exerts a fake cough, indicating for Jackie to stay.

"I see you two have made up." She says disapprovingly, scanning Jackie up and down. Jackie is silent. "What happened to standing your ground, darling?"

Jackie nods. "I am, mother."

Once back in their room, Jackie shuts the door quietly. She bends over to pick up her pants and Jack can't help but to stare with a smirk. She always had a cute butt. She stands up to find Jack practically breathing down her neck.

"Jackie," he rubs her arm. "I don't want you to still be mad at me."

"I'm not mad, Jack. I just need time. That's all." She turns away and begins to pick up more of her strewn clothes off the floor.

"But you're leaving again. Can't we just talk about this?"

"Well Jack," she starts sharply. "Every time we 'talk', it ends being just me talking, and you maneuvering me into bed. So unless you actually want to communicate, I don't want to talk to you."

"So you are mad?" He asks gruffly. "And it's all my fault now? You know it takes two people to have sex you sure as hell didn't seem to have a problem with it!"

"Fine you wanna talk, Jack?"

"I do!"

"Fine. How was she Jack?"

"What?" He asks.

"You said you want to talk, so let's talk! How was she?"

"What are you talking about Jackie?" He groans.

"The girl from the dinner dance. Or better yet, all the women! How were they?! Were they better than me?"

Jack is at a loss for words.

"So now you're not gonna talk?" Jackie taunts angrily. "You already got me into bed, so what's Jack Kennedy's next move huh?"

"ENOUGH!" Jack yells banging his fists in the table. Jackie is startled. "They were nothing like you, Jackie. Okay? I'm stupid, I'm a dick, I'm weak! Okay? I love you dammit Jackie!"

"Than why don't you stop?" She says glaring at him.

"I...I can't." He shakes his head.

Jackie scoffs. "So it's worth it?! It's worth embarrassing me?! It's worth hurting me?! It's worth the children, who view as a GOD, growing up and finding out that you fucked the entire White House staff?!"

"No, no it's not." Jack sits on the bed and puts his head in his hands. He hated himself, he never wanted to let his children down. Jackie stares at him coldly until he finally looks up at her.

"I love you Jack, but I just can't deal with you right now.

"Jackie," he breaths. "I really need you right now. Please dear God, just come to back Washington with me tonight. Please."

She shakes her head. "Now you know how it feels to need someone, and them not be there."

She brushes past him and leaves the room. Once she closes the door behind her, she leans against it and begins to cry.

When will the cycle end?