Harry POV
"Can't breathe." I mumbled as the lads smooshed me into a tight hug. Agh.. curse Liam and His six-pack. "So.. how long has this been going on?" Zayn smirked at me, while the lads looked at me also demanding an answer. "Well.." I mumbled while trailing off. "It all happened like this."
Flashback
"Maybe this will compensate." I mumbled as I found the remaining pain killers and I unscrewed the lid and popped them all down my throat. As time flowed in, nothing happened and I just lay on the bathroom floor waiting for all this to end. When it did finally start numbing me down, I heard a click of the door opening.
"Harry?" Louis called out. "Harry?" Liam called out also. Crap I thought. Why is it that I suddenly regret my own decision. I couldn't even get a single sound out of my mouth. I wanted to say I'm here, I'm here, but I couldn't. I can already feel myself drifting. When Louis arrived, I saw him for a second, and my eyes finally closed. If I remember what I saw seconds ago, he looked pretty tired with bags under his eyes while his hair is all tousled into what I call 'sex-hair'.
His eyes has lost it's shine when we usually looked at each other. I felt guilty about what I did. Maybe I did this to finally run away ... the easiest way out. But the moment I saw Lou's face, those suicidal thoughts suddenly dissappeared, and got replaced with the longing of wanting to hold that chest-nut coloured hair and kiss those luscious pink lips.
A pang of guilt hit me when I felt him grab me and is starting to shake me. "HARRY!" he screamed on my ears. "HARRY!!" he screamed again. I wanted to open my eyes right now and wrap an arm around him but I couldn't. Shit. shit. shit. I hate swearing, but right now is an exception.
I wanted to hit myself for doing something stupid again to make Louis hate me. I already made a mistake with that brunette, and now him. I can't live with the fact that Louis felt hurt because I did something so stupid as to actually to try to kill myself.
I awoke days later I thought as I felt sore all-over. Louis propped himself beside me while he's asleep. He looked so exhausted. The doctor popped in, and I told him to say that I'm in a coma. I told him it's classified information to say why I'm doing it, but I needed to.
He promised that he'll do so If I promised to pay a little extra for his effort of hiding the truth. I agreed not caring that much. I fell asleep at random times sometimes looking at Louis while he's still asleep, and sometimes pretending to sleep. I heard him say that he'll break up with me within one month seeing as the sdoctor did what's best, and concealed the truth just a bit while exposing that I can infact hear whatever they say.
I felt no need to blame him if he did actually break up with me, but I thought that 1 month is a little too long to even decide. 2 weeks after I felt like I wanted to comfort him even if he wasn't even aware of my doing. He woke up looking all cute, and looked away just in time.
"Harry." his voice asked groggily and I ignored him for a bit. I thought that if it appeared that I don't remember him, then we might not talk about it for while, and not make it awkward. "Is that my name?" I called out dumbly. The guilt was eating me, but the despiration of wanting to be together with Louis was simply of a bigger deal.
End of Flashback
"Oh God Harry! That's so sweer!" Liam gushed and I groaned while rolling my eyes. Louis snored loudly and I flinched by the sudden sound. A chuckle escaped my lips as I kissed his forehead once again.
"Too much PDA!!" The boys pouted while crossing their arms. I laughed silently as Louis rolled over at a more comfortable spot. He looked so god-damn adorable that I couldn't help but think what I wouldn't do for this boy. He is more important to me than life itself.
The day that he thought I was cheating kept re-playing itself on my head. Louis' pained expression always made my heart hurt even the whine he made. It pretty easy to say that I love him, but those are just words. If I can re-play the time again, I'd stop myself from drinking that amount of booze and hitting on that lady, and kissing that brunette in which I had no intention of kissing just for him.
I don't think I'll ever do that again Never in my life have I been so .. so devoted in someone. I mean sure I had girlfriends before, but they are nothing like Lou. None of them can even come close to how much I treasure him.. I swear!!
The boys then left me alone to come back to their flats. I couldn't help but stare at the fragile Louis and how tired he gets when he wasted so much effort on someone like me. Well.. I won't hurt him anymore even if I had to avoid crap on my life from happening. I love him, and I think he loves me... what's left to lose?
Louis POV
I saw nothing but darkness in what I thought was my dreams until I saw Harry there.. like the usual. He flinched when i touched his shoulders. "Louis I'm so.. so.. sorry." he cried silently while he cried on my chest. At this rate he looked so vunerable that I wanted to say that I do forgive him.
Nothing came out.. what's stopping me?
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GEEEZ!!
Took so much time to do this chapter. Had to switch many stuff on my notebook to get it right.
Anyways.. Here you go guys!! Hopefully this explains everything for now.
Pissed with summer school already.. but 2 weeks and 1 day left before I do daily updates for a month then I'm going to Orlando, Florida were One Direction was!!
OMG! EXCITED!! Anyways its at August 23 till the 30th.. so might probably delay the stories for a week :(
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