The Adventure of Fel

chapter seven

       With the cats' help, I busy myself with packing my bag. I only brought two shirts - including the one I'm wearing - so I take one from Ivy's dresser. It's a ratty, old sweatshirt, so I don't think she'll mind. I have a skirt and pair of stretchy black pants, two pairs of underwear (though I'll pick up more later), my toiletries, my journal and maps, and some food I take from the Elements cafeteria. I've filled large, glass containers provided by the staff with all the salad, pasta, and free bread I can manage, as well as some salmon for Gwen and Leo. 

       Lastly, I replace the water in my mermaid's jar and slip it into my bag. 

       "Fel," Gwen says as I stand in the middle of the dorm, wondering what the stars I'm doing. 

       "Where are we going?"

        I hold my map in my hands - the one my parents gave me before I left. North of the City is Hopper Forest. A place I've never been. 

       A place I'm going to go.

      "Hopper Forest," I say aloud. "We'll walk." I see a flash of doubt pass over Gwen's eyes - even Leo doesn't appear particularly pleased about walking - but it quickly passes. I open the door and step into the empty hall. It seems like the stars planned this - planned for there to be no one to stop me.

       It's still early when we step into the cool Spring air. I'm almost chilly despite the slight sun. I take out my Communicator band and send Ivy and my parents a quick message - quicker than they deserve, I think guiltily after I've hit send. Then I throw the band off to the side, into the bushes. I walk a few paces, then turn around again, realizing it's probably not a good idea to leave a device with all my personal information where anyone could find it. I jump on it instead, again and again until the screen is cracked and the mechanical insides hang out, a mess of wires and the green, plant-based electrical powder. 

       I expect the cats to look at least a little alarmed, but they show no surprise when I turn back around. I'm wondering what happened to Gwen, who just a moon ago told me, with the best intent possible, I could never be a traveler. I ask her what changed her mind as we walk North, passing by the few open stores and early risers. 

       "I can't really explain it," She mews quietly. "I was reminded of something of my past, I guess, and it made me want everything you want to be possible, if that makes any sense." 

      "What was it?" I ask. "That reminded you." Gwen and Leo don't like to talk about where they're from. I wonder if they were both abandoned by their mother and litters, but it seems too personal to just...ask. I must be right because neither cat responds. Trying to lighten the mood, I pretend to examine my map. 

       "So!" I chirp. "We're in the heart of the City. If we keep moving North, we'll reach the train station in a few blocks. We'll take that as far as we can go, or closest to Hopper anyway, and then make our way." 

       "Yay!" Leo says. I give him a grateful look, and he says 'you're welcome' with a glint of his eyes. He stops walking and waits for me to catch up so we can walk together.

       "I've never been in a forest before," he announces. "I heard there are deer there." 

       "Yes," I laugh. "We might very well see a deer. I wish I brought my textbook on different regions and their species and stuff. I could be our tour guide." 

        Leo grins in the way cats do, and one of his front teeth sticks out. I used to grin when I saw this, but I quickly realized my feline friend is self-conscious about his tooth. Nowadays I just smile to myself when I see him happy. 

       "You know," Leo says as we turn onto another street. I can see the station up ahead, and the already long line of people waiting for tickets. "Ever since I was a kit, I've wanted to travel. I was never brave enough to. And now I'm here." His whole being seems pleased, from the brightness of his eyes to the twitch of his tail, ears alert and walk bouncy. Some say we can't ever hope to truly understand animals, but I disagree. We're different, sure, but in the end, aren't we all just cells and star dust? I look up at the sky and suddenly recall a prayer to the stars my mom taught me when I was around ten. 

I do not have to tilt my head to see the stars
Because they are all around me.
They surround this planet
A blanket
Against the otherwise dark universe. 

       I smile as we approach the back of the line. I'm still smiling when we're on the train, when we're at our first stop, third, sixth - and I'm still smiling when, in late afternoon, the train rolls to a lazy stop, and we exit and see the forest below. I have the stars, but I also have me, I have Leo and Gwen, and I have the world around me. For the first time, I wonder if they are all, in fact, the same.