Scarlet Zobelle's
Natulala lang ako habang naglalakad pabalik kung saan ko iniwan si Seah. It's obvious its her. I remembered the same exact hair, eyes, skin and face of her.
"Sorry Seah for wasting your time waiting for me." I apologized
Again she smiled. Nag-patuloy kami maghanap ng mga gagamitin sa party. I can't fully concentrate at the things we do because I'm busy thinking of one particular thing.
"Zobelle tara na mukhang wala naman tayong mabibili pa."
Tumango na lang ako at sumunod sa kanya papuntang counter. She paid everything, looking at her gestures makes me believe that Nixon found his other half.
Umalis kami at umuwi ng bahay. Until now I can't digest all the incident that happened.
Pagka-dating namin ay agad akong dumiretso sa kwarto but unexpectedly Nixon is seating at the couch while doing some works.
I passed by silently I don't want to create noise because it will be akward for the both of us.
"Scarlet." His calm voice. Shit! He called me by my first name.
I gently face him while bitting my lip. I don't know what to do. Gosh, this is really frustrating.
"Are you still mad?" He asked.
Galit pa ba ako? This is not the time to say that I'm mad. I don't have the guts to tell him that. Wala hindi ko kaya.
"N-no I-im not." My voice is getting weak. I can't let him conclude that I'm still mad.
"If you are still mad we could talk." No we can't! Hindi ngayon! This is not the right time to confess or to confront you and most importantly this is not the time to move on!
"I'm tired Nixon, siguro bukas na lang?" I said.
He nodded as a sign of agreement. So I raised my brows and started leaving his sight. I slowly went upstairs to my room and rested for a while.
Tomorrow is he's special day. He's birthday to be exact. As much as I wanted to be happy on his birthday. But I don't know how. Gustuhin ko, kaso may pumipigil sakin.
There are so many things that keeps on bothering me. Ang daming bagay ang gusto makalimutan. I always feel like my head is going to explode any minute.
First Cindy's identity. Who is she? not even a single clue! Wala akong nakuha. Second, si Zero. Do I even love him? Or do I love him just to forget Nixon. I don't want to hurt him. Hindi ako ganung klasing tao. I don't hurt the person I love. But the question is. Do I love him?
And lastly, Nixon. I'm afraid. I am really afraid in the outcome of everything. Takot ako kung ano mangyayari. I can't predict anything. It's really hard for the both of us especially to him he has a wife. Why would I break their undying love?
Pumunta ako sa banyo at naghilamos ng mukha. This things are really stressing me out. I pack all my things that I might need for tomorrow.
I opened the luggage that I used in my long stay at France. Since it's hard for me to pack at a short number of time. The first thing that I saw was Zero.
Zero's Polaroid picture that I stole from him. He was too cute and adorable in here so I decided to steal it from his office while cleaning.
It's a candid picture of him while laughing. The picture says it all. He's cuteness, he's love and of course he's happiness that he truly deserves.
Feeling ko nga eh matching pictures to. I wonder kung nasaan yung pair nung picture na to? Hays. Hayaan ko na kaya?
I kept the picture in my wallet at inagpatuloy ang pag-iimpake ng gamit. I brought everything even the box of letters.
Ano kayang ginagawa ni Zero ngayon? He's probably shouting. He always shouts and I don't even know why? he interacts with other people calm and naturally pero sakin lagi nalang sigaw. Nakaka-bingi din kaya.
Matutulog na sana ako ng may kumatok sa pintuan ko. Maybe it's dad? I opened the door and my mother waved at me.
"Mom? What do you need po?" I asked.
"Nothing anak. I'm just here to talk to you. May problema ka ba? You can talk to us." My mom answered with a concerned look.
Problem? What made my mother asked that kind of question. Magaling naman ako mag-tago ng nararamdaman diba? So what's the drill?
"Mom, how many times do I have to tell you. Wala akong problema kung meron man I'll tell it to you." Sagot ko.
Naging mapanatag ang ekspresyon ng mukha niya. Pero yung sa akin I am still bothered. Maybe nakakahalata na talaga sila. I can't hide my sadness anymore.
"By the way anak. Look at Nixon and Seah. They both indeed love each other. Ikaw kaya anak? Kailan ka magpapa-kasal?" tanong niya.
WHAT?! I almost choked hearing her statement. That question was disturbing. I can never find a Nixon in my life. I don't want any Nixon to come to my life again and break those promises. I promise myself that I won't look to a guy like Nixon, a guy who never accomplish his promises to me. I promise myself that I won't hurt myself again.
"Ma, it's so early pa kaya para magpa-kasal. Tsaka Ma hindi pa ako ready sa mga ganyang bagay. I promise you Ma, if I finally found my one true love that I will treasure forever I will never let him go. I will never hurt him. I will make him feel that he is lucky to have a girl like me. But this is not the time Ma for that kind of things. I'll focus on work, myself, and to my beloved family." I smiled while uttering those words.
All the things I said were true. All I wanted is to fulfill my dreams to marry the man I love to marry a man who will treat me different and special. To make me happy like no one else does.
"Sige Anak, you're right mukhang hindi ka pa handa sa ganung bagay. I'll be going. Sleep well goodnight. Sweet dreams darling." she said and tapped my shoulders.
Tumayo siya at bago umalis ay tiningan niya ulit ako at nag-salita.
"You will find him, and if you do. love him and you will be given a love you always deserve."
My mom's words are full of wisdom. I am thankful to have a mom like her and I will always be thankful.
Fate do your job and find me that person. Help me find him. Help me become happy just this once let me smile.
End of Chapter Ten
So hey guys! School is starting tomorrow so here's my short update! I'll be updating slowly lol but thankyou for all the positive feed backs! love you xoxoxo
-xoloverina
