The Dick of Steel (Kenman Fanfiction) WIP

Fatass Returns

(From Kenny's point of view.)

"Kenny, wake up."
I awoke with a jolt, rubbing my eyes and rolling over to face my door. Karen was poking her head around the doorway, staring at me worriedly. 
"The fat kid is here again," she murmured quietly.
"Oh, fuck..." I muttered, rubbing my eyes again. Cartman was here. I knew it. "Hurry, hide what's left of the Cheesy Poofs, he'll eat all of them again if he finds them, and we can't afford that."
"Of course, we wouldn't want to waste food, would we?" Karen sighed and walked out of the room. I waited until the sound of her footsteps disappeared down the hallway. 

As soon as I was sure she was gone, I leapt out of my bed, slammed my bedroom door shut and locked it. I ran over to my dresser and tore open the drawers. I dug through the pairs of tattered clothes, throwing them carelessly behind me, until finally I found them - the nude pictures I had taken of Cartman without him knowing I had done so. I had to hide them before he got here. Panicked, I glanced around the room. Where would I hide them? I thought to myself. Surely Cartman would go through my room when he got the chance. He'd done that to Butters before. 

I was starting to sweat. What if he got through my whole room? Without thinking, I stuffed the photos down the front of my pants. It was uncomfortable having the edge of a photo jabbing into the corner of my junk, but it was for the greater good. I opened my door and walked down the hallway, wincing as the edge of the photos jabbed deeper into my junk when I walked. 

Karen shuffled out of the way of the door as I approached. I walked sort of bandy-legged now, with my knees spread apart, so walking didn't hurt as much. I opened the door, and sure enough, there was Cartman. He had his arms crossed and I was sure he had been waiting a while, because there were shuffle marks in the snow around the doorstep.
"It's about time," he said impatiently, squeezing himself through the doorway without even being invited in. I sighed as he brushed snow off his shoulders, which fell onto the floor and dampened our already filthy carpet. 
"I didn't invite you in," I muttered with an irritated tone, though I really didn't mind. Actually, I was glad he was here. I didn't even mind the stabbing pain from the photos anymore.

He threw himself down on the couch and took off his gloves, which he tossed lazily onto the arm of the chair. I studied him intently. He looked impatient. I walked over to the other side of the couch and sat down next to him. 
"So did you need something?" I asked. He stared at me with a salty expression for a few moments before finally opening his mouth to speak.
"I don't know." I stared at him.
"...So you just came over here for no reason?"
"Yep." He was quiet for a few moments more. Then, he turned and looked at me. "What the hell took you so long to answer the door? Couldn't your lazy ass little sister have let me in?"
"Hey, don't talk about Karen that way, fatass!" I snarled. He flinched slightly and shook his head. 
"Whatever. What took you so long to answer the door?"
"Oh. I- I was- uh- picking up-" I stammered. I saw Cartman narrow his eyes at me. 
"Spit it out," he said.
"I was cleaning my room." I said finally after a moment's hesitation. I stared at the carpet. I could feel his gaze boring into me. Then he just shrugged, made a clicking noise and leaned back into the couch.
"Well, I don't really know what you want from me, or why you're here," I muttered.
"Eh, I really just came here to raid your fridge. I've already tried Stan and Kahl, but they both kicked me out as soon as I got there." I felt the corners of my mouth twitch as I tried not to smile. I had always loved the way he pronounced Kyle's name. Kyle hated it, in fact, he had corrected Cartman multiple times when he said "Kahl" or "Kyel" instead of the proper pronunciation. 

"I've gotta go to the bathroom real quick," I said, standing up. I wasn't worried about him going through my things anymore, because I knew I had the photos. Plus, I doubted that he would actually go through the bathroom. I could go and hide the photos there, and it would be no big deal.