Whirlwind//G.D & I.M

13

Lucy's p.o.v
"When shall I come over?" I responded, I started shaking uncontrollably again "now" was the response I got, I sighed, why was I doing this? "I'm coming" I said back. It was too late to back down now. I was going to tell him about the kiss. I didn't want to tell him, but I can't just let the guilt get to me. I just hope Ivan won't hate me. I steadied my breathing and stood up off my bed, I walked downstairs and pulled on my converse "mum I'm going out" I called out, she walked out the living room and asked where I was going, so I told her Ivan's. She offered to drive and although I didn't want her to take me, at least I would get there quicker. I allowed her to take me and so she put on her brown suede boots and grabbed her car keys before us both walking out the house and into the car. Within five minutes we were at Ivan's house. "How long do you think you'll be?" She asked, I just shrugged "do you want me to wait out here for you?" She asked, I shook my head no, she nodded and kissed me on the cheek "have a nice time" I smiled at her slightly and kissed her on the cheek before getting out the car and knocking on Ivan's door.

I waiting impatiently, tapping my foot against the pavement. Soon Ivan came to the door and opened it, stepping to the side for me to come in. I walked in and shut the door behind me, pulling my shoes off after. He walked over and sat down on the sofa so I followed behind, sitting next to him. We were both silent. "What do you need to tell me?" Ivan asked, I could hear the worry in his voice. I shook my head and covered my face with my hands, I felt him hold onto my hands and pull them away from my face. I looked towards him and already could feel my eyes watering. "Well?" He asked, I took a deep breath before telling him everything. "Before you say anything" I said "let me finish everything I have to say." He nodded, saying nothing, I again took another deep breath and exhaled slowly before starting off with everything I needed to say. "So when I told you the other day that I was going to see Jessie and Alex, I wasn't actually meeting them, I met this guy called Grayson when I went running and started talking, he asked me if I wanted to go to the skatepark with him and his twin brother Ethan, I didn't want you to worry so I told you I was meeting Jessica and Alex" Ivan went to say something or to question me so before he could say anything I started speaking again "I went to the skatepark with them and had a really good time, they're both really kind and funny. Grayson invited me back to their house, so I thought since I was having a good time I would go." Ivan just nodded "After hanging out with them for a bit I went home, although Grayson seemed upset because he asked if I was single and of course I said no" Ivan nodded and a very slight smile appeared on his face "I soon went home and I'm pretty sure Grayson liked me, but I wasn't positive. A day or two passed and I met up with them again and ended up staying the night, but I stayed downstairs and slept on the sofa. In the middle of the night I woke up to someone downstairs and it was Grayson getting something to eat, he sat on the sofa and we started talking and before I knew it he leaned in and kissed me" As soon as the words came out of my mouth Ivan's face dropped "and I didn't stop him" I then said, I looked down and wiped the few tears that escaped my eyes. "Why?" Ivan asked, with a husky and deepened voice "I'm not finished" I said glumly. He sighed and let me carry on. "I fell asleep on his shoulder and then in the morning Grayson spoke to me about it and told me we had to do something about it, but I was scared and upset with myself so I just ignored it and was planning on ignoring it. He got annoyed and I left. That's why I had the panic attack because I can't look at you without feeling guilty" Ivan sighed and covered his face in his hands "I'm sorry" I said, he shook his head "sorry can't help this" he said, I sighed and more tears escaped my eyes "you kissed someone else lucy.  Yes okay he started the kiss but you didn't stop him!" I started to get more upset "I was tired! I wasn't thinking!" He shook his head. "Please just leave" my face dropped "what" I asked, he pointed to the door "leave. Please." I sighed and wiped my eyes, I nodded and stood up, walking over to the door. I pulled my shoes on and opened the door "I really am sorry Ivan. I love you" he said nothing, I walked out of his house and shut the door behind me, I didn't know where to go or who to go to. I couldn't tell Jessica or Alex, they wouldn't understand. I decided to phone Ethan. I knew his company could help.