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guilt - devin booker

Saturday's were always a busy day for the Booker family. With both of their kids in sports, majority of their saturdays were spent on a baseball or soccer field but this Saturday was one of the toughest ones because Devin wasn't able to get back from his east coast road trip.

  It was 6:45 and (Your Name) was already up preparing breakfast for her twins, Kaiden and Aiden. The twins were identical twins that looked excactly like Devin, it was almost as if he had given birth to them instead of you. As the pancakes were cooking you heard the sound of two pairs of feet coming down the stairs and into the kitchen.

Aiden walked in first and almost immediately wrapped his arms around you. "Good morning mommy." Out of their sons Kayden was the most like (Your Name), outgoing, and very expressive. Ayden on the other hand was more like Devin when it came to expressing himself. "Good morning Ayden" She replied kissing him on the cheek. Kayden grabbed his plate of food and began to eat silently.

"What's wrong Kayden, why are you being so quiet?"

"Does daddy love us?" Her heart sank at her sons words. She never thought that their children would ever question Devin's love for them. "Baby, what makes you think that?"

"Daddy is never here, it's like he don't want to be around us. I hate him"

"Me too, I hate daddy." Kayden echoed agreeing with his brother.

She didn't know how to respond to their confession. Having a father who was gone all the time was tough but she never thought the twins would hate their dad.

While getting the boys dressed for their baseball game, (Your Name) couldn't help but wonder how Devin would take the news that his only children hate him.

The sound of her cell phone ringing snapped her out of her thoughts. When she checked the caller iD, her body filled with nervousness at the sight of 'Husband💍❤️' . She answered the FaceTime call and tried to act as normal as possible

"Good morning baby" Devin greeted.

   After talking for fifteen minutes Devin had asked what she dreaded 'Let me talk to the boys.' When she tried to hand Ayden the phone he refused and Kayden followed suit.

"Babe what's with the boys? Why don't they wanna talk to me?" Devin questioned confusion written all over his face. After a explanation of the mornings events. Devin was in a state of shock once he heard that his own flesh and blood hated him.

"What am I supposed to do? My kids hate me because I'm gone but my job requires it." Devin began to rant he felt completely guilty, it was his fault that his sons hated him and he didn't know how to make it any better.

-

The sun shined brightly over the local Phoenix baseball field. Kayden and Ayden sat in the dugout with their teammates waiting for the start of their game. Looking around the stands (Your Name) noticed a tall figure standing in the very back of the stands. Once she focused on the figure (Your Name) realized that it was Devin, she swiftly grabbed her purse and made her way to him.

"How'd you get here so quickly? I thought y'all didn't come back until tomorrow?"

"Well I was going to surprise the boys but seeing as they hate me maybe I should go."

(Your Name) frowned at her husbands words, "Babe you know that the boys were just upset that you aren't here as much, they don't really hate you."

"Either way it still hurts to think my only children could ever hate me."

As the game went on Devin's mind was filled with thoughts on how the encounter with his sons would go. Would they ignore him? Or would they forget what they even said this morning?

-

The sound of the final buzzer rang out through the stadium signaling the end of the teams baseball game. After the boys shook hands with the other team they made their way up to where their parents sat. Kayden was the first to notice Devin's presence, he whispered something in Ayden ear and he nodded in agreement.

(Your Name) looked at Devin before speaking, "Good game boys"

"Thank you mommy" the twins replied in unison.

  Devin stood awkwardly as he watched the boys speak to their mother and not him. "Y'all played great." Devin finally spoke up waiting for a reply.

   Ayden was the first one to break. "Thank you daddy, I missed you!" Ayden smiled before hugging Devin. However, Kayden kept up his silent treatment and began to walk away. (Your Name) gave Devin a sympathetic look before following him to the car.

 

-

The ride home was filled with tension, Ayden would ask questions about Devin's  games and his favorite player Marquese. Kayden switched from looking out the window to playing on his iPad.

   Devin  had finally reached his breaking point he was tired of being ignored by his own son. "Kayden why are you so upset with me? Huh?" Kayden rolled his eyes and continued to pretend like he couldn't hear what his father said.

Devin pulled into a vacant parking lot and stopped the car. "I asked you a question and I expect an answer." Kayden let out a breath before speaking  "You always leave us, it's like you don't wanna be around us." Kayden told Devin looking down at his hands.

"Kayden I want to be around you guys all the time but my job requires me to travel but that doesn't me I love you any less." Devin confessed

"Well it doesn't feel that way when your gone."

"I'm sorry bud. How about we go as a family to where ever you boys wanna go?" Devin compromised hoping to make things better.

The twins looked at each other before unaismosly deciding, "TOP GOLF!"

Devin laughed "Top Golf it is." Devin was filled with happiness at the fact that he got his sons back on speaking terms.