No Time To Heal [BTS J.Jk]

I

When was the last time he enjoyed the attention and praises he got, the dance and vocal practices he attended and the high expectations he was able to reach?

Jungkook couldn't remember.

He did his best from day one and found happiness in everything and anything, but the happiness seemed to have gotten lost somewhere on the way to the top.

But it's a long story, so I guess, we have to start from the very beginning.

Everything began when Jeongguk sprained his ankle during one of their earlier dance practices in 2014.

He danced with the highest concentration he could muster. The next official concert after a long time was already planned and slowly approaching so he needed to work harder.

He every single move to every part of every song was engraved in his mind. How long it took to learn, master and remember? Too long to even recall.

That's how much he would do for his hyungs to be proud and for BTS to succeed. That's how important it was to him.

So when he danced with his hyungs, he made sure to do everything right. Everything had to be on point. He wouldn't accept anything else but perfection.

He could live with his hyungs making mistakes. Jungkook wouldn't blame them, considering that he knew how hard it was to dance to songs like Danger. But he couldn't tolerate it if he himself made mistakes. He was the one who went to America to take dance lessons. He was the one who should be able to master it, so his hyungs and the staff members mustn't worry about him as well.

So when he did make a mistake and sprained his ankle in the process, he was devastated.

Everything went too fast. While he was supposed to move to the left, Jimin had to switch with him and move to the right, leaving Jimin to be in the middle and front. But instead, his hyung accidentally moved right and to the back, where Jungkook was supposed to be moving.

Jungkook tried to dodge in time by jumping back, temporarily forgetting that Yoongi was positioned there. He was lucky that Suga moved just in time so they wouldn't collide. But he was also unlucky because he didn't think through how he would be landing.

So when his feet touched the floor, he was unbalanced and ended up falling over and spraining his ankle during the fall.

He needed some time to realize what just happened, but when he did, he could only feel the pain that was spreading steadily.

His group members were surrounding him and looking at him with worry written all over their faces.

„Oh my god, I'm so sorry Kookie!" Jimin said, kneeling beside him and looking like he was about to burst out in tears.

„I think we should take a break,"  Namjoon suggested while looking around for their choreographer who seemed to have left the room some time ago.  „It could be something serious and we shouldn't risk anything."

Jin and Hoseok were about to help him up, but he just shook his head and quickly said „No, no. Everything is ok."

Everyone looked at him and he could see the hesitation and doubt in their still worried gazes.

Taehyung sighed and asked him whether he was sure about that.  „That did not look like a soft landing. Are you sure you are alright? What if you twisted your ankle or something?"

Oh, how right V was. But no one really noticed anything until it was too late. Way too late in the far future.

Jungkook shook his head repeatedly and reluctantly stood up to show them that there was no need to worry, even though he wanted to do nothing else but to cry out in pain and take a break. Maybe even go and see a doctor if he could. 

But he couldn't. He didn't want to let his members down. Not now when the concert was so soon.

„Seriously, you guys worry too much." If he knew what he caused by saying that sentence, he wouldn't have said it so easily.

„See? Everything is alright." He started using this sentence way too often.

„We should keep going." He should have rested instead.

„I can do it. I'm not the Golden Maknae for nothing."  What does it even mean to be the Golden Maknae?

„So you shouldn't worry about me. Worry about something else." He regrets ever saying this.

But he said it anyway and now he has to face the consequences of his words.

Words that were spoken so lightly without any misleading intentions quickly grew into something that couldn't be fixed.