The Ghosts of the Past, Present, and Future

chapter six

Sundays always seem to just drag by, and this particular rainy Sunday did just that.

However, it gave me a lot of time to think. And let me tell you this, thinking is the most dangerous thing that you could ever do. It will destroy you inside in out. My whole life has been dull and boring, therefore giving me unlimited amounts of time to think, so by doing this, I am destroyed. Both inside and out.

Thinking about Ezra and our impending lunch date, I got scared.

 I scared myself by how easily I let him in, how easily I let him see past my walls.

I have spent the last five years of my life constructing the concrete walls that shielded my mind from the people around me. I have no idea how I could be so horribly foolish to let a guy I don’t even know to break those walls down, even for just a night.

I decided that I would still go to lunch with Ezra tomorrow, but I will not be so open with him. I keep those walls up for a reason; I don’t want to be hurt again by people who claim they love me.

The day went by slowly, and I couldn’t really go out and do anything since it was storming so furiously. However, I wanted to get out of the house, so I went to dinner at the café that I met Nova, Oakley, and Aspen at.

It was about a ten minute drive from the townhouse, but it took me longer seeing as I was so skittish driving in the rain since I was in a horrible car crash with my grandparents when I was 11. It killed both of them instantly, leaving me with a broken leg and a broken rib and being stuck in the hospital for a week. My grandfather was driving when rain started to pour down all around us and he hydroplaned and couldn’t get control on the car and we rammed into an 18-wheeler, which caused about eight other cars to wreck. So therefore, driving in the rain terrifies me. However, being stuck in a house for a whole day scares me too. I need change.

I sat outside, since there was an overhang that shielded me from the rain currently pouring down onto the ground. I got a cup of coffee, and one sip from the cup instantly warmed me up and put a smile onto my face. I ordered a traditional French pie filled with meat and cheese, called quiche lorraine. For dessert, I got a chocolate croissant, which is my favorite thing in the world.

I just sat at my table for a long time, listening to the rain hitting the metal roof overhead, and watching cars pass by. When it got dark, I figured it was time to head home, so I ran to my car to try to avoid getting wet. I drove home through the downpour, trying to not get nervous, but still failing miserably.

Once I got into the house, I went to my room and changed out of my wet to clothes and into dry sweatpants and a hoodie.

I went into the living room and went through the girls’ large selection of movie titles. After a little while of looking, I went with The Great Gatsby, one of my favorite movies.

 About halfway through the movie, the rain was still beating down on the roof above me, and my eyelids were seconds away from closing and not opening until I woke up the next morning. I tried to keep them open, but to no avail.

I woke up the next day to sun streaming through the window, and found myself still on the couch.

I didn’t realize that there was persistent knocking on the door until I got up to go to the bathroom.

I just stood there confused, debating whether or not to open the door. Nova called me yesterday and told me that they wouldn’t be home until this evening, so it couldn’t be them at the door. I looked over to the clock in the kitchen which read that it was 10:30.