April 14th,1997
St Keller, Maine
Eastern Maine Medical Center
We sit in the waiting room. Lori's on the phone with her work, I'm on the phone with Aunt Adele, and Nana Edith is just trying to keep Nathaniel and Collin calm. Finally, they call Mom's name. "Amanda Nielsen." A serious looking doctor tells us to sit down, in a little room. Then he says the coldest words I will ever hear.
"Amanda Nielsen is brain dead."
I can't think. I can't feel, I can't breathe. I'm not sure how I get out of that room, but I do. And I call Toby.
"Toby, it's my mom."
"What about her?" he asks
"She's-she's brain dead"
I can't say these words anymore. Before he can reply, I hang up the phone. Aunt Adele and Alyssa arrive, and Nana breaks the news. We each have ten minutes to say goodbye, and then she's off life support. Alone with Mom, I say, "Hey Mom. Thanks for being there for me through these 15 years. Your going to a better place now, okay? Someday, someday I'll be there too. And I love you. I will always love you. Bye bye, Mommy." When I leave the room, Toby is there. "Lori told me what happened. I'm so sorry, Athena."
"Toby, how did you get here?"
"My mom drove me. Are you okay?"
I don't reply. Instead, I just start crying, and I run to Toby and he just lets me cry.
