Eclipsed Star

Chapter Twenty-six

JAKE POV

Dazed, I smiled at Roman and wrapped my arms tightly around him as I drifted asleep to his voice. When I awoke, I eased my arm from around Roman and took my phone out from my jacket's pocket. After clicking the device on, the screen revealed it was just past four o'clock. I groaned.

Sliding the phone back into my pocket, I slowly got up to pull on my jacket, jeans and boots. I found my shirt not far from where we had laid and picked it up. It had now almost dried. I turned it inside out to lay it over Roman. He shifted beside me and winced.

I bit my lip looking down at him as gray and white images from hours ago played over in my mind. He'd taken me so slowly and softly, lovingly and I'd gone at it like some kind of animal. My teeth dug further into my lip as I shook my head. I shouldn't have taken him so hard and fast. I should have taken care of him, took my time, like he had to me. I hadn't been fair. I felt fine and while I watched Roman turn over again, his face grimaced in pain. It wasn't how I had planned it, how I had planned to be with him.

Everything Roman had done for me had been perfect, but for him, I had planned on taking him just as slow, deeply, passionately, until we were used to it, together and could go faster. I wanted to really show him just how much he meant to me. But I'd done the opposite-he'd made love with me and I just ... I just fucked him.

I growled low-again it was like something had taken over. I could feel my hands begin to shake as I shook my head and backed away to the edge of the building. My breath began to catch and turn to pants as I stared down at my hands. My vision tinted red. My heart had begun to race.

I felt like something was pushing me over, until I heard Roman murmur, "Jake." And it was then, it all disappeared like nothing had even happened: my breathing eased back to normal, as did my heart and the shaking in my hands. The red tint in my vision eased back to the usual colours of the world.

I dragged my teeth over my lip. I couldn't stay any longer, not how I felt with this thing taking over me, the fear I had gripping me that I'd hurt Roman and then on top of it all, the chance someone had found my hospital bed empty without my being discharged first.

I padded over my pockets in search for a pen and a piece of paper, but failed to find anything. Glancing over my shoulder, I found a small area on the corner of a bench, next to some plants and found what mom used to use to weight tiny amounts of food. Beside it was a pen and notepad. I took them and wrote out my note before placing them back like they hadn't been moved and reread my note: I'm sorry for last night. I didn't mean to hurt you. I love you Roman, meet me tonight by the back gate at curfew. I stepped forward to placed it beside Roman's hand, where I hoped he'd find it.

When I crossed the greenhouse, I jumped from building to building until I reached the building closest to the exit Roman had told me about earlier and then I did the stupidest thing I'd ever done, simply because I didn't think-I jumped from the second floor.

When I landed on the dirt ground, I was hidden by the shadows. I expected something to give out from under me: my back, my knee, my ankle, just something, but I was pain free and still standing. My head levered to back to where I had jumped from. I shouldn't have been pain free, let alone still standing. That medicine Roman had given me was something.

Hearing a dog bark in the distance, I pulled the hood of my jacket over my head and took off out the back access door. Once outside the sector, I kept my head down and my hands in my pockets as I made my way down the streets of Forks.

My hands began to shake as I thought more about what I'd done to Roman. I breathed deep and shook my head as the aggravation increased further. The night seemed to get hotter the more I walked, even after I unzipped my jacket to the center of my bare chest. I felt like busting out of my clothes and running, but that didn't make any sense.