Is It Me? (junshua One Shots)

22 - HANAHAKI

Dedicated and requested by: shhhhhzzzzzz stay awesome.

Joshua's pov.

My body, emotions and brain hates me. They all give me this things that made me weak. I wish i didn't really fell for a him.

I sighed knowingly he can't never fell inlove with me and cure me.

I was suffering from a disease called hanahaki disease. I brows my eyes on the text book i was handling.

Hanahaki disease

A disease that the host will experience coughing out petals.

The disease is caused by when the host is inlove with another person deeply. This disease can only be ended if the person returns his feelings, the hist unfortunately dies or he would get surgery for removing this and after the operation he will lost all of his feelings for the other person.

I widen my eyes then sighing. I am getting my surgery this month. I don't wanna lose my feelings for this guy, i am afraid. Afraid that i will not feep the same way again about love, afraid that this will be the last happiness i will feel and afraid to be cold and hard like a block of ice.

"junhui?" the teacher called and i release my book and adjusted my glasses. I looked over to him. I smiled as he raised his hands. His face was fit for being someone to love, not like mine. His eyes lande on mine and i go back to my book, we saw each other in a split second and i blushed. I can feel my throat sore again and i put my hands on my mouth and cooughed it out. I looked over my hands and there were blood and a purlish colored petal. I sighed and wiped it with my tissue. The bell rang and i stood up.

"oh hi! Hong jisoo right?" i looked over my shoulders and looked at the tall guy behind me. My throat began to sore and i coughed it out.

"yeah." his eyes widen at my face and i furrowed my eyebrows.

"are you sick, you are red and you have blood on your lips. Do you need me to take you to the doctor or..." i smiled and and coughed again.

"i am fine, it is just some cough." he had a worried smirk on his face and i coughed again.

"well i just wanna ask if you have a someone to join you at lunch." i coughed again and again and again. And put on a broken smile.

It has been a week since jun and i started eating lunch together. But all those happiness hurts me inside. Nit one but two petals are showing up in a cough. I was startled a bit. If he is feeling the same way i should be cured, but why did he asked me for lunch everyday if he doesn't feel the same? I started to slowly drift my back off the wall.

The disease is getting worst and there are only 5 days till i am getting my surgery. I cried hard because of the pain i am experiencing. It was excruciating. I cried hard and hard. When will this end.

I don't wanna lose my feelings to him.

And he doesn't feel the same way for me.

There was only one thing left for me to do. I sighed and cried loudly.

Do i really want this?

Do i deserve this?

I cried and fell on the floor while i was curled like a ball and slowly drifted to sleep.

I woke up in a beeping sound. I looked at my sorroundings and it was a hospital room. I looked around and saw no one else. The door unlocked and i saw a nurse and the doctor holding out a clipboard.

"how are you feeling mr. Hong?" i nodded and smiled. I sat up and she smiled at me.

"you know you are lucky to have a friend that brought you here." i looked at her with furrowed eyebrows. The word friend is an alien to me.

"his name was..." the doctor snaps her hand remembering the guy's name that brought me here.

"it was wen junhai." i widen in shock as the door unlocked again.

"it is wen junhui miss, how is he doctor?" the guy that took me here is jun? How? Where? When? Why? What?!

"he is doing fine. Let me ask how is your throat?" i nodded for a positive response. It was still sore but it was bareable.

"we what happened to you mister is that you unconciously coughed out all of the petals out of your lungs and no single one stayed. Ofcourse bloud follows them too." the doctor sighed and i held my mouth down to my throat to my chest.

"how did you took me here?" i was able to ask that when my throats are still sore.

"you uhmmm, i was calling you and you won't pick up. I started to get worried. I asked jeonghan if he knows your house, he sent me the adress. When i came you were unconcious on the floor," he looked down and my eyes were tearing up a little.

"when i came closer you were cold. I started to get more worried and did anything. But uhm i... I might have kissed you and when i do you threw up a lot of petals and blood on the floor. Why didn't you told me you have hanahaki?" he started to tear up and sat on a chair in front off me. The doctor and nurse walked out of my room. I looked at him and i cried.

"i didn't tell you because i am afraid to lose you. I was afraid to lose my feelings for you or even you. So i made the way were when i could never felt anything again." i cried and i can feel his arns around me.

"don't worry jisoo, you got me and i won't leave you."