The guys are coming back from tour today so we decided to invite them for dinner. I leave the cafe early so that I can help Bella for groceries shopping.
Natalia and I have been casually talking. Jake as usual, tries to convince me to not leading her in a wrong way but I don't think I did. I made it pretty clear to her that I have a girlfriend and a son at home. Even if she likes me she can't be hoping for something from me, right?
"I kinda regret inviting them to our house tonight. My back hurts from carrying these bags." I complain as I load the bags into our car. "Really? Try being heavily pregnant for months. Let's see if you break your back or what." Bella put one hand on her waist.
"Okay, can't compete with that, wonder woman." I raise my hands in surrender because I know there's no way I can fight that.
In the car Bella played with Jaime to entertain him. "Jaime would you like to have some ice cream?" she asked him. "Daddy, Jaime wants some ice cream." she says to me.
I glared at her, knowing that she's using him for her benefit. "Just tell me it's you that wants the ice cream. It's not nice taking our son as advantage." I laughed, making a turn to the ice cream place we used to go.
After having our ice creams we decided to take a walk around the town. Then we got to the place where I made her recall the first time we met. "Remember the first time we got here? I kissed you and you start to remember the party night at Yoandri's. And then you took me to your place and we had-"
Before I can finish my sentence Bella cover my mouth with her hand. "Not in front of Jaime!" she widened her eyes on me. Damn, I forgot I can't talk about sex and stuff in front of my baby. "But of course I remember. How can I forget that." she smiles, her cheeks turn red as she looks away.
After that we went straight to our home. I played with Jaime while Bella is cooking at the kitchen. "You really don't feel tired, do you? Cmon, why don't you feel like sleeping right now." I squeezed Jaime's cheeks.
"Just play with him, Daddy. He'll get tired soon." Bella yells from the kitchen. She was right, just after a few minutes Jaime crawls to my lap and starts to doze off when I pat him. As soon as he's fast asleep I can finally get a chance to disturb my girlfriend in the kitchen.
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"You really can't leave me alone, can you?" Bella giggles when I hugs her from the back. "I leave you enough when I was working." I rest my chin on her shoulder. "Let's enjoy our moments together before we add another kid in this house." I said, before she slapped my cheek without even looking at me. "No other child until Jaime turns two." she tells me.
An hour later our doorbell rang. It was the guys, of course. We hugged each other and they gave us some paper bags, claiming that it contains some toys for Jaime. "Also some gifts for you guys." Joel tells us.
In the table they shared their stories on what happened during the tour. It sounds awesome. I have been dreaming of that experience since the first day I joined the band. They were so excited when they told us about it.
I was happy for them, but the more I listened the more I feel longing to be with the band. When the dinner ended and the guys leave to their house I started to feel empty. As if I've been missing out, the thing I've always denied before.
While Bella was handling Jaime in his room, I took out my guitar and play one of our songs on my bed. Damn, the feels these fingers touching the strings. I miss this. I miss being in the band.
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I was too immersed when I finally noticed Bella leaning her side on the wall staring at me. "You miss it. It has been running through your vein, the feelings to perform." she says to me, smiling faintly.
I put the guitar away and shook my head. "I've made the decision. I can't leave you and Jaime for the performances and stuff."
Bella nod her head and sat on the bed, sliding under the cover. "Why not? You'll come back home. It's not like you're leaving forever." She says.
"And leave you alone with Jaime? Remember during the first months of his life you were so stressed it's almost like you're having a depression? I can't risk leaving you for that to happen again." I slipped my tounge.
Bella looked at me, confused. "So, you made your decision to stay here because you're scared that without you I'll be mental and harm your son?" she asked, eyes locked on me.
This is going to be bad. I can't lead this on to be a fight. "I didn't notice what I was saying, okay? Let's just forget it." I grabbed my jacket. "Where are you going?" she grabbed my hand. "I don't want us to fight, Bella. Let's just get some time alone and calm down. I'll come back later." I said before I left our room.
I took myself to a bar near the cafe. I can't believe I let those words out from my mouth. But she was right, I was afraid that she'd go crazy when she was alone with Jaime and hurt our son. I have to be near her to make sure she'll be fine. Maybe I was a fool for thinking so.
I don't want to get drunk, I just need to get away before I slipped out more things that can hurt her. Also, I need some time alone after what I felt about the band.
"Erick?" a familiar voice called for me. I turned around to find it was Natalia.
