Post 1x06 – because I could simply not fathom that Cesar would just simply agree to date Olivia after One argument? Or one argument that they showed us??
This is my take on what happened in between 1x06 and 1x07.
Thanks so much to GeekWeirdo for the cover :* I love it !!
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Cesar shivered in the cool night air, it was chilly tonight and he hadn't bothered to grab a sweat shirt or a jacket. He had been waiting for hours and as soon as he had seen Monse leave Ruby's place to go back to her own he had been hot on her tail immediately.
Olivia likes you and I like her so that's what you should do?
Had she seriously said that? who says stuff like that.
He knew why she had said it. Of course, it was all his fault and he knew it.
He HAD to be typical guy and kiss Olivia. What was wrong with him? Couldn't he have kept his hormones in control for like five seconds? Arghhhh and the worst part was it wasn't like he had been super into Olivia, he had been feeling butt hurt over Monse's "not safe" comment and he had grabbed on to the first person that had made him feel wanted. And that was the definition of him being a total and utter pig.
And now he was going to fix it.
He saw Monse slip inside her place as soon as her house came in view. He was about to quickly follow when he saw her dad sitting in the dining room. Crap. He had forgotten he'd be back by now.
Well desperate times call for desperate measures.
He went behind her house and swung himself onto the tree in her backyard. Old habits for hard.
He jumped on the ledge of the second floor from the three. A few more steps and he found himself at Monse's bathroom window. God he hoped her dad wasn't taking a leak.
He peeked inside. Phew the bathroom was empty.
He wiggled in through the window and dropped in the bathroom. He listened carefully when he heard no voices outside,he opened the bathroom door and looked in the hallway to make sure the coast was clear and then he ran into Monse's room. Monse stood with her back to him looking at something on her phone.
Cesar closed the door and took a deep breath "Hey"
Monse gasped and spun around her hand on her chest. "CESAR what are you doing here ?" She asked quickly "my dad is DOWNSTAIRS"
Cesar slowly walked towards her "Don't worry I snuck in through the bathroom like I always — he didn't see"
Monse looked at him warily "You need to leave— why are you here ?"
"I wanted to talk to you" Cesar said quietly
Monse shrugged "you could've called or texted"
"Tone is NEVER properly conveyed through text" he shot back at her using her own words at him.
She raised her eyebrows and smiled. And for a minute it was like everything was the same between them again but then her expression clouded over and she said "I'm serious Cesar you need to leave"
Cesar held up his hands "Look hear me out first — I know you think us being together will mess the fam up but it won't. The only reason things got so messy the past couple of days is because Ruby is into Olivia — and Neither Ruby nor Jamal is into you. Well I sure as hell hope so not" he shook his head "so there's no chance of things getting messed up. They'll be happy for us I'm telling you"
Monse looked at him quite. Too quite. This wasn't good.
"What about you ?" Monse asked softly
"What about me?" Cesar asked frowning "I'm pretty sure I'd be happy for me too!"
"No you said Ruby and Jamal aren't into me but what about you?" She questioned
"What? Ofcourse I'm into you Monse" She was being crazy "isn't that the whole point ?" He stepped forward but stopped when she stepped back " I want to be with you"
"Then why did you kiss Olivia?" Monse asked tears brimming at the corner of her eyes.
Cesar closed his eyes. He knew she would ask again but this time he had an answer. "Because I'm stupid okay. I was feeling hurt about what you said and Olivia was being nice to me and and — I'm an idiot and I'm sorry" he let out breathe frustrated with himself "I know that sounds lame but I'm not good with words like you are. I don't know what to say"
Monse looked at him without saying anything for a few minutes and then asked him "So if I tell you I was mad at you for kissing Olivia, and angry, and not in the right state of mind and I went and hooked up with Oscar you'd be okay with that ?"
Cesar felt a sudden angry hot feeling flare up on his stomach, he shot Monse a dark look "don't be ridiculous" he said angrily "that's not something to joke about"
Monse shook her head "I'm not joking"
Cesar looked at her ceiling and sighed "Yeah I can see what you mean I would be angry. I'd be furious. I'd probably kill Spooky/- but I know you would never do that"
Monse slowly nodded at him. "That's right" she whispered " I would never do that" she went and sat down on her bed "but you did" she closed her eyes "we didn't even know what this was yet" she gestured between them weakly "and you messed it up"
Cesar felt his heart squeeze painfully. He wished he had Monse's head right now so he'd know what to say. "So that's why your throwing this away ?" He asked finally "because I kissed Olivia ? You won't give me a chance to fix it?"
Monse shook her head. "No I'm telling you there was nothing there in the first place" she whispered "so what can we fix?"
"Don't say that Monse" Cesar said and sat down next down next to her "please" he hesitated and then slowly grabbed her hand, he sighed in relief when she didn't pull away "I was your first" he said his eyes burning into hers "you were my first — that's something — that's everything!"
Monse looked at him and gently pulled her hand out of his and said "Maybe that's all we were meant to be" she said sadly "each other's first"
"Monse—" Cesar started
"Hey" Monse cut off "I think you should go home now" she looked away from him "and text Olivia — she's waiting for it I know" she paused "don't hurt her"
She didn't say anything more but Cesar knew exactly what she was thinking — her unspoken words hung heavy in the air, don't hurt her like you hurt me.
Cesar swallowed painfully a lump rising in his throat "if that's what you want"
Monse modded still not looking at him "That's exactly what I want"
Cesar stood up slowly and started to walk out her room. He stopped and looked at her one last time — hoping she would ask him to stop. To stay. To say she forgave him. But she just continued to look away.
He did the hardest thing he had done yet in his life. He walked away from his best friend.
He quickly slipped in the bathroom and climbed onto the ledge and when his feet finally the ground so did his heart. He just sat down on the grass numb and broken. He felt tears prick at the corner of his eyes.
He had just lost Monse. Lost her without even really having her. All for a stupid kiss. A stupid kiss he hadn't even wanted
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And that's all folks.
Okay so I know this was sad. But I promise I'll make up for this in the next one ❤️
