The Worst Voltron Fanfiction

Chapter Five: The Wae Of The Country Boi

In This special Chapter we flash sidewaes to Keithy's "childhood" as a Texan boi. And his emo journey growing up.

(Kill myself)

*

Keithy boi sits on the roof, pre pubescent and watching the sunrise. He stayed on the roof all nite watching the sky, because sleep is for the weak only.

He fell off the roof and goes inside the shack to eat some dry ceral, its all they have to eat out here in the Texan desert, and all they have to drink is sweet ice tea.

Keef is just finish burning the cereal box when he hears the sounds of his Papa's motorcycle aproching.

He tries runs to hide but then trips and decides its too much effort to get beck up.
His daddo enters.

"What in tarnation?" his daddo says in question form. He looks at Keef's limp body for a few seconds."Oh yea i have a son." he says in realize, and then walks to go put grocery on the table that is literally just a plank of wood held up by piles of books.

Keef stands. "Papa the aliens still have fail to retrieve my messages!" he says sadly. Because he is sad. He trys to contect aliens because he has a really smexy knife that he is suspicious of. Also space is cool.

"Hmm," the daddo puts his hands on his hippos. "What did you ask them for?" he ask.

"I asks them if they could come and take me into space obviously!" Keef replies. "What else would you contect aliens for?" he say. Throwing his smol arms up in da air.

"I guess you are correcty Keith my boi." the daddo says. And he places a stuffed hippo on the table.
Keith shakes his smol head. "Oh daddio.. When will you ever stop worshiping hippos." he sighs with smile.
His daddo give an murderus glare.

*

Keef walks home the next day, he spent the night in a hole somewhere, but not sleeping, he just intensely stares at his knife. It's a very complicated relationship he has with it.
He walk into the house and be met with blaring country musics.
He looks in amaze at the huge boomboxes and his daddio square danceing beautifully. He looks like an angel, and smol Keith wanted nothing more but to follow in his bootsteps.

Keefs dad was decently noice when he remembered his Keithy boi existed. He was at the home sometimes, and he bought him red flannels, cowboi hats, weapons, and country musics, and raised him in the wae of the country boi.

"No wae you are winning this Carl!" Daddio says, geting the name wrong like almost often.

"Da hec? My smol legs are very gud at this my dear father." Keef say back at him. Keef is trying to beet his daddio in an very intense and professional country dance off.

They are both sweating very moistly, and the song is almost ending, but at the last 28 sekonds, Keithy accidently trips his daddio, dew to him wearing over sized boots.
Keith is scared really bad, this is the worst that could ever happin. He freeze where he stands.

His daddio get off the floor slowly, he slowly turn around and doesnt even look keef in his eyeballs. Keith watches as he simply walks across the filthy room, and out the door. Keith runs to the door frame and consufed watches as his daddio continues to walk away, farther and farther.

"Uhh.. Papa?.." Keef say in confusion. But is no use, because that day, his daddio just kept walking away, and he never came back i guess.

So Keef stayed in the shack for a while, untill he runs out of dry cereal, but then he went out to hunt for meat, and he got caught by the orphanage people if that makes any sense. He didn't think it made sense. He would have rather lived in the wild and survive naked and hunt with his beloved knife.

But alast our young Keithy was not that fortunate.

And so, our smol Texan boi grew up with only his knife by his side, helping him stab away his feelings. He dealt with many annoying child's, and many grownups who were big fat meanies, and he had many people and things that hurt him outside and on the inside.
Keith got slightly older, and when he was thinking he would never find love with a living person, he found Shiro.
Shiro did lots of nice things for Keef, he accepted his Texan\Emo waes, they became very gud friends. Shiro one day heard keef talking about aliens in his slumber, and he got keef into the space school.
Keef be so overjoyed, he almost smiled.

So he went to the space school with Shiro, and it was Keef's first school. But it didn't count because it only teached about space. So Our Keithy was doomed to have terrible spelling, and NOONE could fix it.
But other then that, Shiro adopted Keef and they lived happy ever after.

Untill Shiro left Him, and then Lance bullied hem, and Allur was rasist to hem, and he got beet up alot, then Shiro disappeared again, and then everyone forced hem to lead them, and then hated on hem for not knowing how to lead people, and then Shiro was mean to hem, and then he ran away and joined a gang, and then the gang maid hem sed and he almost dies alot.

Oh well, Hopefully his mom is alive... And stays alive.
I might have jinxed it but oh well!

Till this day, Keef lives sadly, and everyday he hide his Texan accent, never gets to go to hot topic anymor, and has sworn to never square dnce ever again.