sin & sorcery

8. never meant for you to fix yourself

Edo-Gray is frustrated with other-Natsu and -Gray's inability to shoot first. Sting distracts him from memories of his time in Imperium, and how he came to Undertown.

TW for (consensual) violent sex, flashbacks to torture and brainwashing

This chapter has a lot of (angsty) smut. Edo-Gray is bad at feelings and has questionable coping mechanisms.

bruises on your thighs like my fingerprints
this is for tonight, the darkess that you felt
i never meant for you to fix yourself

.

As soon as they were through the portal and back into the brothel, Gray growled and slammed his hand against the wall. Rogue tried to touch his shoulder, but he shook it off, stalking to the other side of the room.

"They don't get it," he said, leaning against Rogue's desk. "They're gonna get flatlined if they won't pull the trigger." Sting nodded, sitting on the edge of the bed and tapping the screen on his wrist.

"Skavak's ice might be drek, but his guards won't be kind," he said, swiping through several layers of data. His false eye flickered as he absorbed the information. "Maybe we should do it ourselves."

"We can't," Gray argued, crossing his arms. "Nat—the other Natsu has to go. We need to smuggle the weapons out, and he's the only one who can do it." He sighed, running a hand through his hair. "Frak it. I can take him and watch his back. I can't guarantee he won't have to defend himself, but I'll take care of what I can."

"Gray..." Rogue said carefully, moving toward him and reaching out again. It felt sometimes like Gray was a wild thing, a surging, chaotic energy that couldn't be tamed. Rogue had heard enough of Gray's nightmares to know that his sometimes-savage behaviors were very, very justified. Rogue reached out a hand gently and Gray looked like he might snarl, but instead he sighed and allowed the touch.

"I can handle it," Gray said, voice softer as Rogue caressed his cheek. He leaned into it and kissed Rogue's palm. "He's not... him." Rogue brushed Gray's bangs from his eyes, and Gray reached out, pulling Rogue closer to him and holding him tightly. "If... if this works. If I see him again..." he trailed off, burying his face in Rogue's hair. "Do we have to end this?" His voice was small and soft and Rogue felt his heart break.

"Oh, maitea," Rogue said, stroking Gray's hair and tugging him towards the bed. They sat down next to Sting, who leaned against Gray's back and settled a hand on his hip. "I don't know. It's up to you and him. This has always been an... unusual arrangement."

"You're not just... substitutes," Gray said, voice shaky. "I wasn't just... waiting for him. I... I lo..." He sighed. "Mi amas vin." Rogue held him tighter.

"We love you, too," he said softly. Rogue knew that Gray had always felt like an intruder in his and Sting's relationship, but that was never how they'd seen him.

"Why don't we grab some ramen and head to the stack?" Sting suggested, pressing a kiss to the back of Gray's neck. "Rogue's gotta work soon." Gray sighed, nodding a bit and pulling Rogue back in for another soft, slow kiss.

"If anyone bruises you today, I'm breaking their legs," Gray said quietly, rubbing his thumb over the purplish-green mark on Rogue's wrist. "Don't let them hurt you, okay?" Rogue didn't nod, knowing that Gray knew that he couldn't make any promises.

"C'mon," Sting said roughly, tugging Gray to his feet and leaning down to kiss Rogue goodbye. "Let's go home."

~

By the time they got back to the stack, Gray's skin was thrumming, and he longed for the pills in his jacket pocket. He growled, shaking his head as he kicked off his boots.