"I would be thrilled if you actually meant it..." Phil whispered, his heart feeling as though it was going to beat out of his chest. He lowered his head, clenching his fists in an attempt to hide his shaking hands. After a few seconds of awkward silence, he slowly glanced up at Dan to see his reaction. Dan was simply staring at him, his mouth open slightly and his eyes wide. Phil felt his chest tightening and his throat became scratchy from a fresh bout of tears threatening to spill forth. "Oh god... you probably hate me now, don't you?"
"What?" Dan shook his head frantically. "No, Phil, I..."
"You don't have to lie to me." Phil slowly stood up, brushing the bits of grass and dirt off his jeans. "I know that you only like me as a friend..." He swung his bag onto his shoulder, keeping his eyes fixed on the dying grass. "I should probably go now..." Before Dan could utter a response, he turned and ran, dashing across the lawn and over the hill as tears blurred his vision and stung at his eyes. Ignoring the strange looks he was getting from a few people sitting atop the hill, he hurried past them, nearly stumbling and falling down more than a few times. His lungs were aching and his side was throbbing so badly it made him feel as though he was about to pass out, but Phil didn't stop until he reached his house. No one else in his family got home until late, which meant he had to fumble in his pocket for his keys and unlock the door, nearly dropping them onto the ground in the process. The instant he got inside, he sank down into a ball with his back pressed against the door, his entire body shaking with sobs. What the hell have you done? Why would you even bring that up? Dan hates you now, and it's all your fault! And he probably hates you even more for running away from him...
Phil was vaguely aware of his phone buzzing in his back pocket, but he didn't bother to look at it. Forcing himself to stand up, he walked over to the couch and curled up on it, but it was only slightly more comfortable than the floor. As a fresh bout of tears welled in his eyes, he heard someone knocking on the door. Sighing quietly, he stood up and walked over, slowly opening the door. His eyes widened when he saw that it was Dan, standing there with his hands in his pockets. With a small sigh, Phil kept his eyes lowered, fixing them on Dan's beat-up sneakers. "Hey, Dan..." he whispered, his voice trembling slightly.
"Is it okay if I come in?" Dan asked quietly.
"I guess so..." Phil mumbled. He's gonna yell at you... he's still angry with you... He stepped aside and walked over to the couch, sitting down and avoiding eye contact with Dan. Dan walked inside and closed the door before sitting down next to Phil, the beaten old couch sinking slightly under his weight. Phil bit his lip and managed to will himself to speak. "So... I'm assuming you're here to yell at me..."
"No, Phil. I'm not." Dan shook his head and reached towards Phil, putting a hand on his shoulder. "I'm here to apologize to you..."
"About what?" Phil asked. "I'm the one who should be apologizing to you..."
Dan sighed quietly and lifted Phil's head with his other hand, making eye contact with him. "Philly, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry... I should have told you earlier..."
"Dan, what are you talking about?" Phil sighed. "You're being confusing."
"Phil, when I was on the phone with you and I said that I loved you... I actually meant it."
Phil sighed and lowered his eyes. "You don't have to lie to me, Dan. I know you're trying to make me feel better..."
"I'm not making this up, Phil. I'm telling the truth." Dan rubbed the tears away from Phil's eyes. "I was too scared to tell you before because I was worried you'd reject me... but now that I know you feel the same way, I want to know that I really do love you. I love you more than anything else in the world, Phil..."
"Oh my god..." Phil whispered, his heart thudding in his chest so hard it almost physically hurt. "You really mean it?"
"I couldn't make this up if I tried, Phil..."
Happy tears welling in his eyes, Phil pulled Dan into a tight hug, nuzzling his face into his shoulder. "I can't believe it... y-you actually like me back?"
Dan returned the embrace with a huge smile. "Of course I do, Phil... I have for so long..."
Sniffing a bit, Phil pulled back a bit and looked up at Dan, gazing at him. The two made eye contact, which caused Phil to blush the slightest bit. He stayed stock-still as Dan's gaze flickered from his eyes down to his lips and back up again. Phil bit his lip, looking away shyly. "What are you doing?"
"Oh..." Dan stayed quiet for a few seconds. "I... I was going to kiss you... but if you don't want to, that's fine..."
"No, it's fine. You can do it, it's just..." Phil sighed quietly. "I've never done it before. What if I mess it up or something?"
"It's fine, Phil." Dan smiled and ruffled his hair. "Just because it's your first kiss doesn't mean it has to be perfect."
Phil managed a tiny smile in return. "I guess you're right. But I'm still nervous about it..."
"Don't worry about it. Just follow what I do, okay?" Dan said.
"Alright..." Phil nodded slowly.
Cupping Phil's face in his hands, Dan leaned forward until their lips were just barely brushing together. The simple action caused Phil's heart to pound so fast he thought it was going to beat out of his chest, but he managed to close his eyes and kiss back, wrapping his arms around Dan's neck and pulling him closer. The kiss was short and gentle, but it somehow made it all the better. When the two eventually pulled away, both of them were blushing profusely. After a few moments of silence, Dan tapped Phil's nose with his finger, resulting in an embarrassed giggle. "Silly..."
"You're the silly one, you spork," Dan chuckled, ruffling Phil's hair. Phil smiled and nuzzled his face into Dan's shoulder, still beaming. Dan giggled and patted his head. "What is it?"
"So, uh... a-are we dating now, or something?" Phil asked.
Dan nodded. "Yeah... I guess we are." He planted a kiss on top of Phil's head with a smile.
Blushing a bit, Phil looked up at Dan. "Is it too early to tell you that I love you?"
"Not at all... in fact, it's the perfect time for me to tell you that I love you too."
YOU ARE READING
The Boy in the Garden (Phan)
Romance(Highschool AU) Dan Howell and Phil Lester had nothing in common. But when the two of them end up working together in the abandoned school garden, will friendship- or something more- develop between them?