The Boy in the Garden (Phan)

Chapter 13

IMPORTANT A/N: I have made several edits to this book. Please go back and read the previous chapters before reading this one. This is also the final chapter, and I hope you all enjoy it, even if it seems a bit rushed.

Two Months Later

"Phil, just tell me what's wrong..." Dan sighed, glancing over towards Phil, sitting across from him on the roof. "You've just seemed... off lately."

"It... it's hard to explain." Phil bit his lip, tugging his sleeves over his hands as he looked across towards the setting sun. "And you're probably gonna get upset..."

"I could never get upset at you, Phil..." Dan smiled and gently took Phil's hand in his own. "You can tell me anything..." 

"You really, really don't want to hear this..." Phil mumbled, leaning against Dan's shoulder and pushing his glasses up his nose with two fingers.

"Why not? Did something bad happen?" Dan asked gently.

Phil shook his head. "No, it's going to happen... pretty soon, actually, in like two weeks..."

"Phil, you're worrying me..." Frowning, Dan gently kissed the top of Phil's head. "Please, please tell me, Philly... I promise I won't get mad, no matter what you tell me..."

"Okay, fine..." Phil sighed and lowered his head, hiding his face in his free hand. "Dan, I'm moving..."

"What?" Dan could feel his stomach sink and his throat closing as he stared at Phil in disbelief. "What do you mean?"

"We're moving... we're leaving and going to Manchester." Phil mumbled. "I didn't want to, it was all my parents' choice, I'm sorry..."

"But... but why?" Dan whispered, tears beginning to spill from his eyes. "I don't want you to leave, Phil..."

"I don't want to leave either, Dan..." Phil lifted his head, rubbing his eyes with the heel of his hand. "I'm sorry, but I can't do anything about it..."

Dan shook his head in a futile attempt to clear the tears from his eyes, breathing heavily as he tried and failed to calm himself down. This couldn't be happening- Phil couldn't leave, he needed him. He couldn't bear the thought of being without him; just the thought of trying to go through life without the joyful, optimistic, absolutely beautiful boy with him made him feel even worse. "N-no, there's got to be something we can do... we c-can talk to them together, you have to s-stay..."

"Dan, there's nothing I can do, I'm sorry!" Phil let out a trembling sob, covering his mouth with his hand and lowering his head again. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I tried, and I meant to tell you earlier..."

Dan pulled Phil into his arms and squeezed him tight, cutting off his words as he began crying against his shoulder. "Please, d-don't do this to me! I love you s-so much, I don't want you to go..." He cut himself off with a shaky gasp as he tried to catch his breath, failing to calm down as he kept sobbing uncontrollably. "You're everything I have, Phil! Please, d-don't..." He could hear Phil crying too and felt a rush of guilt, knowing that he was only upsetting Phil more by doing this, but he couldn't stop. Phil was leaving him, beautiful amazing Phil was leaving him, and he was powerless to keep if from happening. He had never felt so much hopelessness at once- it seemed as though the sky had fallen and was slowly crushing him, squeezing every ounce of happiness he had ever felt out of him, in the most slow and painful way possible.

Finally, Phil said, "I'm sorry, Dan... I mean, I know it won't be the same, but we can still call each other and Skype and stuff..." He paused to let out a shaky sigh. "And I can still come visit you occasionally... it's not like we're not gonna be able to stay in touch..."

"It's not gonna be the same..." Dan shook his head. "P-please, there has to be something..." At a loss for words, he fell silent again, shaking slightly in Phil's arms from a combination of the overwhelming sadness still in his system and the chilly October wind. After a seemingly endless stretch of silence, Dan spoke again, his voice shaking. "I love you so much... it's not gonna be the same if we can't be as close... I'm so worried I'm gonna lose you, Philly, I'm worried you're gonna forget about me and not care about me anymore..."

"Oh, Dan, you're not gonna lose me... I could never forget about you..." Phil gently lifted Dan's head up and looked into his eyes, running his fingers through his messy curls. "Don't say stuff like that... I could never not care about you. You don't know how amazing you are..."

Dan shook his head and hid his face again, still crying and unable to focus on what Phil was saying. After seemingly hours, his tears subsided, leaving him feeling completely hollow and empty. Absolutely nothing could comfort him in this moment, or possibly ever again.

~{}~

Dan refused to leave Phil's side for the next week. Their time spent together consisted of solely crying and murmuring rushed "I love you"'s to each other, both of them not knowing how to go on once their limited time together was over.

And then the dreaded day came. Dan showed up at Phil's house just as his parents had finished packing up the moving van and had tackled him in his tightest hug yet, kissing him over and over and begging him not to go in between heavy sobs that made his chest hurt. They'd stood in the driveway for over an hour until Phil couldn't stay any longer. Dan had ran after the moving van all the way down the block, until it was too fast and his tired and shaky legs couldn't keep up any longer. He dropped to his knees and stared at the van as it drove away, feeling absolutely nothing. Phil was gone, and there was nothing he could do.

~{}~

With a soft gasp, Dan's eyes popped open, his hands gripping the blanket underneath him as he stared up at the ceiling. His heart pounding in his chest, he looked around the room he was in, which seemed strangely  familiar to him. The dim moonlight was shining through the partially open curtains, illuminating the bedroom in a faint white light. That was one hell of a dream... was it a dream? His eyes quickly darted towards the figure sleeping on the left side of the bed. He let out an audible sigh of relief when he saw that it was Phil, who was hugging his pillow and had his face partially hidden in it. Dan quickly moved towards Phil and managed to pull him into a tight hug despite the pillow partially obstructing his reach.

"Dan? W-what are you doing?" Phil let out a tiny yawn, still half asleep as he pushed the pillow out of the way.

"You're still here..." Dan mumbled, hiding his face in Phil's chest. "I thought I lost you..."

"What do you mean? Did you have a nightmare or something?" Phil asked gently.

"I don't know, I don't know what it was at all..." Dan sniffed. "What year is it?"

"What do you mean, what year is it?"

"I don't know, just tell me... what's happening? What's happening with us, like... what are we? I don't know-" Dan sighed.

"Well, let me think... we're both YouTubers," Phil began. "We've been dating for seven years... and I asked you to marry me yesterday..."

"I remember..." Dan smiled, the memory rushing back to him in a happy burst. He squeezed Phil tighter than before, letting out a tiny laugh. "I remember now... you're still here..."

"I'm still here, Dan..." Phil smiled, hugging Dan tightly as the brunette buried his head in his shoulder. "I'm always gonna be here..." 

"You promise?" Dan asked quietly.

"I promise."