Abit about faith

Chapter 6

I stared at my feet until I suddenly heard the Door open. I slowly looked up and I then heard, "oh hey there faith are you okay." Standing there was my granny looking as beautiful as ever. I then went on to say "I'm fine gran I came to see u." She new I was not just there to see her, and with my head looking toward the floor again she lifted my chin and said to me "come in every things going to be alright, I'm here now" just hearing my gran say she here for me brought a tear to my eye, the tear then turned in to many and my face was then dripping with tear. My gran turned round and just hugged me, nothing was said she hugged me tight so I new she was here for me.

While my granny hugged me all my memories flooded back, my gran meant more to me than anything. She was all I had as well as my grandad, I felt safe when I was with her;I felt happy. Even though I went in to care at 5 I've never did not see my grandparents I alway made sure I was apart of their life's like they alway made sure they were apart of mine. I away remember walking home from my old school and dropping off at theirs for hours just talking to them and doing normal stuff ; it was every other day like Monday,Wednesday,Fridays. I had good memories of when I was 5 before I got put into care, all the chasing round the garden and blowing bubble. When I was growing up (say like 8) I always wondered why I never stayed with my grandma and grandad, but now I've grown up more I realise now. Having a 5 year old running around the house was a challenge in it self but that was not the only reason I went in to care, it cause they weren't able to give me what I needed like take me to the park as much as I needed and stuff like that; the didn't have the energy to keep up with a 5 year old.

The hug came to an end and I then look at her in the eyes and said "I love you gran,u mean the world to me." I hear a soft slow voice say back "awwwrh I love you more." I then had a little smile on my face and said "always" I then heard a little chuckle and then I heard "alway" back. I went and sat down in the kitchen and I saw my grandad so I went up to him and gave him a huge hug, he then hugged back and kissed the top of my head. He said "fancy seeing you here" with a smile on his face I then reply "well what can I say you just can't get ride of me." We both then giggled and went back in to a hug. After half an hour of talking about what my new school was like I then ask the important question I started or saying "gran, grandad can I stay with you I don't want to go back." My gran then looked at me and took a deep breath and went on to say "tell me what happened,please faith I can't help you if you don't tell me."

I slowly sat down and started to cry, I went on saying "I'm sorry I didn't mean to drop this on you,I just can't!! Can't stay in that house any longer." Then my gran quickly said "no you not dropping anything on us,please faith just tell us what going on." I took a deep breath and said "she being rude and she being bitchy, she called me fat and said I'm ungrateful.this is not the only time she done this but it starting to get to much." My grandad then stood up and headed to the door, I ran over to him and pulled him back and said "please grandad don't it will make it worse." He then replayed "how" I then went on saying "cause there have more to pick on me for, saying that I'm not able to stick up for my self and saying I'm a cowered, look grandad it will make it worse please just leave it." He then turned to me and hugged me then said "if they do anything else I'm going to go straight over there" he then look me in the eyes then said "I mean it, I'll be straight round there." I then went back in to the hug and said "thank you" my gran then said "you can stay here but only for tonight and maybe tomorrow night, but that all cause were get in trouble." I then said "I don't want you to get in to trouble because of me. And thank you for letting me stay."

It was now about 7pm, my gran and grandad didn't hear anything from the social, which showed how much my foster partners gave a shit about me. I was relived they didn't give a shit cause it meant I could stay with my gran and grandad. My gran pulled out her old photo albums out and gave then to me and said here let's look at these. She then sat right next to me and opened the photo album, on the first page it was me; me sitting there smiling with a man and a woman. My gran then pointed at the man and woman and said "this is Ur mum and dad." I then look closer and said " wow my mum so beautiful and my dad was so handsome." My gran then said "you've got her eyes and her hair and you've got your dad's nose, but your a split image of your mum." (This was the first time faith have seen pictures of her mum and dad because her gran and grandad didn't want to face having to answer the question what would come next.faith new they died but she didn't now how, and faiths gran and grandad found it difficult to talk about it cause they've never really come to terms with there death.) I then said "do you have any pictures of my mum when she was younger." My gran then turn the page and there was my mum when she was 9, she was so cute. My gran found a picture of my mum my age she then said "look here's your mum when she was you age." I looked and it hard and said "you weren't wrong when you said I looked like her. I thought that was me." I then giggled and then my gran did. It was silent for a moment while we looked at the photo album but I then said "when did my mum and dad meet?." My gran then had a smile on her face and she said "oh well they meet when your mum was 15 and your dad was 16 and they stayed together ever since then." I then answered in amazement "wow that so cute, so when did they get married?." My gran the giggled "well they got married when you mum was 20, and then they had you when your mum was 22 and your dad was 23." I then said "oh wow, that's true love there." My gran then interrupted before I asked another "right it getting late it now 10pm I think we should go to bed now." I then looked at the clock and it was indeed 10pm, I then said "wow them 2hr went really quick." My grandad came in and said "isn't it about time you went to bed." He then giggled and I ran up to him and hugged him and said "aha yup grandad I'm going now." He then said "oh good!! You need your sleep." He then kissed the top of my head and said "good night faith and sleep tight don't let the bed bugs bit." I then giggled and said "love you grandad." And I then hugged him tighter he then said "love you forever and always." I then replayed "always" my gran then came over and said goodnight and after I said goodnight to her I went upstairs and got ready for bed.

I then sat on the bed and cried, I was happy my gran showed me who my mum and dad were but hearing how amazing they were and not getting to grow up with them made me feel so depressed. I wished I could remember them but I just can't I was only 3. I was think how my life would be so much different if I had them in my life, no horrible bitchy foster partners and maybe I wouldn't get bullied. But I then thought in my new school no one noes I have Forster parents, so why was I getting picked on. Maybe cause I am what they say I am, fat ugly and a waste of space. I then was becoming weak and I opened up my bag and searched for my blades, I need to take the pain from my inner demons away so I place the blade on my thigh with pressure and I then dragged the blade across my thighs getting deeper with every cut I did. The time was now midnight and I was sitting on the floor with blood still running out of my cuts. I then got some plasters out and cut then in to small strips and butterfly stitch my 3 deepest cuts with plasters. I then raped a bandage on top so the plasters did not move, I then flushed my bloody tissues down the toilet and I washed my hand to get rid of all the blood. I walk to my bed and got in and I sat up in bed until I slowly drifted of to sleepy.