Abit about faith

Chapter 3

I then knocked on the door and entered, sitting there was my tutor, she then said "hey there faith how has you first couple of lessons been." My reply was "yeah it was alright I suppose." I then walked over and sat down she then said "did you make any friends." I then said "yeah I met somebody I like and hopefully friend, her name is Stacey." I then heard an excited voice saying "Oh Stacy, she's such a lovely girl you would be really good friends." I then went on to say "yeah she's really nice... She's really funny too." Mrs dean then said "how was your first lesson,did you find your way okay. " I then sat there silently I just wanted to hide away, she then looked at me with a soft look then said "that bad hey " I then then just looked at her and nodded.

Soon after mrs Dean said "would you like to go back to lesson or stay here with me and talk some more?" I then quickly replied "NO it's okay I'll go to my next lesson "(I didn't like talking to people about myself especially to teachers.) mrs Deane sweetly smiled at me and got up and said "come on then I'll take you." I stood up fast and followed her to my art lesson. We then got there, but she stopped me before I went in and said "if you need to talk to me I will always be here okay?." I just slowly nodded and said "okay." But I know for a fact I wouldn't go to her, I don't tell nobody about my problems. I opened the door to the art room and walked in. All eyes were on me, I then heard voice from behind saying she was with me sir, sorry about that.

There was a sit next to Stacey, I just hoped Sir would let me sit there. Then I heard a deep masculine voice saying set where ever. I then started to grin and smile, my smile was as big as anything. I was so happy that I could sit next to Stacey, I walked towards Stacey and sat down next to her. She then turned to me and said "yay yay "and my reply was "I know right, this is the best." 45 minutes later the bell goes, everyone started to pack up and then stand behind their chairs ready to be dismissed, the 45 minutes went so fast I enjoyed art, properly because my class was not that big it was mainly girls with about 4 boys.

I stood there at the gates, I looked around searching for my foster mum's car and then I heard a beep from behind. I suddenly and quickly turned around and then saw my foster mums car, I then slowly walked towards the car then got it. I then sat there for about a minute and she turned to me and said "so how was your day." I didn't say anything I just sat there thinking,( it was like I didn't hear her... I went in to my own little world) She then shouted "FAITH!!!! I was talking to you, how was your day." I then snapped out of my day dream and reply "it was okay,at the end of the day it school." That was it, nothing else was said after that she then put the car in to gear and we drove off.

As soon as I got "home" I went straight up stair and shut myself away (It didn't feel like home and never will, I no I don't belong there) I then just drop on my bed and just screamed in to my pillow. As first days go It was a mess, I hate school. The best thing about today at school was art, nobody bothered to say anything and if they did they said it so quietly I did not hear. I lay on the bed and all the embarrassing and nasty things what happened to me at school were racing though my mind, I started to feel more and more depressed. I just wanted to forget but I just couldn't the demons inside me would not just let it go. I became weaker and my past then started coming in to my mind. I felt my emotions getting the better of me, I am scared I will brake my promise that I made to my self. I slowly felt my strength getting weaker as I lay there crying.