The Crush

The Crush (Part 12) - Red

I had never seen that side of Edward. He was always so buttoned up and polished, but he'd pulled out a beast last night. Left me standing with my jaw to the floor. With the ring. With his proclamation- claiming his territory. I had been calling his phone since the night before but he wouldn't pick up for me. I couldn't blame him, but I didn't know where we stood. Had we broken up? Had he proposed? Was that a proposal?

As much as I had been calling Eddie, Michael had been calling me. I couldn't help but wondered how he got away with it - him having a fiancée and all.

Not knowing where I stood with Edward had kind of knocked some sense back into me. What did I really have with Michael? I had him up on a pedestal based on my own fantasies, but he had proven to be nothing but trouble - and lust - in my life since that day at the coffee shop. And I still couldn't get around the fact that he had a fiancée. She wasn't just going to go away because was in the picture.

I was trying to be understanding of his situation, but at the end of the day I didn't owe him anything. I could understand how we had both been just going on in our lives and then boom lightning had struck. But did that mean it was a sign? Was it meant to be?

I was in my car driving to Edward's place. I didn't like how we had left things. I knew he was home because his car was in its usual parking spot.

I knocked and he answered in his work attire. He had on a cream colored button down shirt - tailored to fit his toned physique - and black slacks. His loafers shined like he had a shoe shine kit. Knowing Edward, he probably did. But I had never come across it.

He moved to the side and gestured for me to come in. As soon as I was a few steps in I rounded on him. I know I had no place to be angry, but I had questions and I was tired of being yanked around by the men in my life.

"What is this?" I asked producing the ring. "I've been calling you all night. You put this in my hand and walk out with no explanation. Was that a proposal last night? Or...a break-up?"

"For the time being, it's a promise ring," he said, dead pan. Dry humor. His go to when he was mad.

"What?"

"I'm not into playing games, Nia. And I'm not going to stand by while you cheat on me with this dude you barely know."

"I'm so confused right now, Edward," I said. Just last night he was saying he was going to fight for me. Now it sounded like he wanted nothing to do with me.

"I want you to figure out what and who you want, Nia. I didn't answer your calls last night because I was still pissed off and needed time to cool off before I said or did something we would both regret." He pinned me with his stare.

"I'm still confused as to what we are doing," I said.

"I want you to get him out of our relationship. Until then, I don't feel we can have one."

"But I already told you nothing happened between us," I said, exasperated.

"But it would have only been a matter of time before it did. Don't insult me, Nia. Be honest about your intentions with that fool." He held my eyes. "Otherwise, I'm going take it that his advances were unwanted on your part, find him and beat his ass for trying to take what's mine."

Edward was in rare form this morning. I could tell he was still mad so I was trying to tread lightly, but he was starting to irritate me.

"I don't know how I feel about his advances, Edward, but he didn't force himself on me. I'm an adult and I made a decision not to shut down what was happening between us."

He balled his fist and then released it.

"Then why are you here with me? Why keep calling my phone if he's the one you want, Nia?"

"Because I never said he was the one I wanted! Nothing even went to that extent between us!" I yelled.

"Maybe you should," he said, his nostrils flared and his eyes could strike your heart cold.

"Maybe I should what?" I asked.

"Look, Nia, we've only been dating for six months. Maybe you're not to the point were I am in the relationship. I'm sure about what I want out of this. You obviously aren't. Do I want you to sleep with him?" he asked. "No, but that's what this is all about, huh? You wouldn't be so torn if you didn't want to fuck him, right? So do it. Either he won't live up to your expectations or...he will and somewhere along the way he'll break your heart. There's only one way this is going to end, Nia."

I wanted to slap his whole entire face off. I couldn't believe him. I knew he was pompous and had an ego bigger than the sun but he had a lot of fucking nerve!

"I am not your whore to pimp out just to prove a point," I yelled. "You think this is easy for me? I don't want to be in this situation. I'm trying to do the right thing and you're being a jackass right now."

"I told you how I feel about the situation, Nia. I'm not going to sit around while you mess with this guy behind my back. You're free to do whatever you want to do with him. But that ring in your hand that's real shit," he said. "That's real intentions. That's real love. And I bought that for you and I only want it to go on your hand. I only want that future with you. But I don't want it tarnished with maybes or should have beens. I want you to put that ring on with no doubts about who you want to be with for the rest of our lives."

"Edward..." I started.

"Look, I got to head in to the office. I have a deadline and a layout to set. I think it's best if you just give me a few days and take a few for yourself. Because this love triangle shit is not a good look, Nia. Make a decision. I'm only going to be patient about this for so long."

He opened the door and waited for me to leave. I stepped over the threshold disbelieving our conversation and still with so many unanswered questions.

While he had to work today, I had the good - or bad fortune depending on how you looked at it - of having the day off. I needed some advice and I needed some girl time. There was only person I could call to help me through the struggle. I dialed my best friend and told her to meet me at my coffee spot by my job. I was craving my girl's straight forward advice.

I made it there and looked around for her. I had beaten her there. I grabbed my usual and sat at my table.

"Nia." A voice behind me said. My insides did a somersault. I turned to face Michael. I was not ready to deal with him yet.