The Crush

The Crush (Part 10) - Adore

I must have looked like a deer in headlights. I moved to Edward's side and tried to steer him back down the stairs. He pulled away from me and stepped toward Michael. I could see Michael's shoulders tense and I held my breath. When I saw his fist clench, I sent up a silent prayer that this was not all about to hit the fan in this ritzy ass hotel with all these rich people. I felt like I was in a scene of one of those reality shows Edward teased me for watching. It was a guilty pleasure. Focus, Nia, focus, I said to myself. I stepped closer to Edward and put my arm around his waist.

"Babe, this is Michael," I said, gesturing toward him. "I ran into him on my way out of the bathroom. I just wanted to grab his ear and get a little inside story on his fiancée, Piper, for my article."

Edward's eyes shifted from Michael's to mine. He slid his arm around me and met my eyes. He was all tense and tight. I had never felt or seen him like this. He nodded and held out his other hand to Michael.

"Thanks for helping out my girl," he said, giving me a squeeze. "Always working, this one."

Michael cleared his throat and took Edward's hand.

"Nothing wrong with a little hard work for the things you want in life," Michael said, his gaze sliding to me.

I promise my heart was pounding so hard in my chest it sounded like a drum was beating in my ears. I needed to go and I needed to go now.

"Are you ready to get out of here, baby? I think I've had enough glitter and gold for the night," Edward said. I smiled and nodded. He secured my hand and we made our way back downstairs toward the entrance. I forced myself not to look back for Michael. I was so confused and conflicted. I didn't have the energy – hell I didn't have the confidence – to fight for someone else's fiancé. But if that man didn't churn my insides like nobody else.

In the car ride home, I was so consumed with my thoughts that I barely said a word to Edward. He didn't seem to be in a talkative mood himself. I just kept going over and over the events of the night in my head. It felt like Michael had me on a roller coaster ride in whatever this thing we were doing – or had been doing – was. I was ready to bow out and cut my losses, but that man had a way with words. I didn't know what to believe. Would he really choose me over her? He didn't know me any more than I knew him really. But I had been ready to leave Edward for the chance at him. Could he really feel the connection that I felt? I couldn't be in this alone. It felt too deep.

I heard my phone ping with the sound of a text coming through. I ignored it. I knew it was Michael. He needed to give me some time to process and think. This was just all too much and it was getting messy too fast. What if Edward had walked in on us kissing? I did not want to hurt him like that. I wasn't even sure if I was ready to let him go yet. Michael was just too much of an uncertainty. Maybe my Grandma was right. I needed safety and stability – not all of this up and down drama Michael was bringing.

I reached over and grabbed Edward's hand. He squeezed my fingers and brought my arm up to kiss the back of my hand. My God, this man was so good. I would be stupid to let him go on a whim. Edward pulled into the covered parking spot in front of my building. We got up and he walked me to my door. I stood on my toes and kissed him. He pressed against me. All of his firmness and warmth enveloping me. I broke the kiss and turned to unlock my door. I took his hand in mine and we walked into my apartment. It wasn't fire. It wasn't drama. But it was mine. I was content. I was at peace with this man. He stimulated my mind and my body on the regular. It wasn't his fault that I couldn't get my shit together and see what was right in front of me.

I kicked off my shoes and kissed him deeply, passionately. I was aroused by his steadiness – the sureness I felt in his presence. I was certain that this man loved me and only me. I was certain that this man was mine. All the doubts and insecurities I felt surrounding Michael, none of that was here with this man. And my love for him grew deeper and more assured because of that.

I backed him into my bedroom. He sat on the edge of my bed and ran his hand up the sides of my frame. I grabbed his face in my hands and kissed him. He moaned and pushed me away from him by my hips. I looked down at him confused. Why were we stopping? I was making a decision. He didn't know that, of course, but I wanted to show him that he was the man that I chose. He looked into my eyes and pulled me into a sitting position beside him. He traced my lips with his thumb all the while staring at me in this penetrating way.

He looked at the pad of his thumb that now had the shine of my lip gloss and pink lipstick.

"Why did that guy have your lipstick on his lips?"