The Storms Of August

Chapter Thirty: Ticky Tacky

I was well aware it was illegal for me to be driving. More importantly, I was nearly doubling the speed limit down Hollow Ridge Road in Demi's sports car. I thought she'd be freaking out. I was concerned because this was the second time I've driven a car in my life, but she just sat in the passenger seat, expressionless to the blurry pines that passed her window. It only took a few minutes to get to where we were going. Soon enough I was whipping into the broken, weed infested parking lot. The once dark shadow of the low standing building now had an identity: white and chipped, with foggy windows if they weren't broken and boarded up. The lines of parking spaces were fading into what was left of the asphalt, but only ghosts of them weren't washed out by the rain.

I parked the car near where I found a collection of glass and got out. Demi followed suit, and dragged her feet to where I was taking out a baseball bat and a trash bag of recycled drink containers, mostly glass with the occasional soda can. Two pairs of my dad's plastic eyeware for yard work and woodworking were the last to come out before I slammed the trunk closed.

"What are we doing?" Demi asked, flinching as I tossed the goggles to her.

I walked up to her and stopped at her feet, where the black bag laid, and picked up a bottle, tossing it into the air and smashing it to pieces with one heavy sling of the bat. Once the rain of IPA fell at our feet, I handed her the bat, but kept my grip on it. "It's time for you to start letting go."

She looked at me over her eyelashes, sucking in cheeks that lost the color of tomorrow and took the bat from me. She picked up a bottle from between us and tossed it into the air. The momentary defying of gravity completely flipped her expression. Her eyebrows fell on fuming embers of eyes and her face curled into itself like the heat of her skin crisped her edges. With bounding hands, all of Demi's might went into shattering the bottle. The motion brought a pace to her breathing, like she had life left in her. After the clicking of all the pieces, she continued to look at what she'd done, slightly more at ease than before. Discontent was still prominent, the lack of satisfaction kept her eyes on what's broken and kept her grip in her fingers tight.

"Who was that?" I asked.

"Joe," Demi said distantly, brushing her dark hair out of her face. I hadn't noticed how long it had gotten until she had her back to me. " He never gets what he deserves. He's never known real consequences. He's never felt real hurt." I could feel the anger quaking the ground beneath us. Her rage shook the bat she had held against the pavement.

I remembered that time she drank too much, where emotion and temperatures were hot, and she beat him like a race to the top. The drugs were coursing through her veins and it ultimately brought her lower than she'd ever been. That was the night she kissed me. The night I saw a glimpse of forever and infinite desire then watched it drown in the blood of someone I thought I loved. Someone I almost wished I could have cared more for than a fantasy I didn't want to live coupled with a friendship that was too small for the shoes I put on its feet. "You've beaten him pretty bad in the past." I said distantly. The memory of his blood and lack of relevance to the world still haunts me. The waking nightmare was the look in Demi's eyes and her lack of control. She could have killed him and she didn't give a damn.

"That wasn't real hurt. Wounds of drunken punches and ball game brawls heal. I mean real hurt. The kind that leaves your head screaming. He's never been alone. He's always wanted to live. He's never counted the reasons why and why not. He had you." Demi looked at me, still angry but settled enough to look me in the eye and drive a steak into my heart. "He knew what it was like to be loved by you, to hold your hand, to be the last thought before you closed your eyes at night. And you know what he did, he threw it all away like it was nothing. Some of us would have given our right arm and torched the family fortune to have that chance."