Pained

8

i want to waste away
i want to see the most beautiful days
i want to see the most beautiful girl
and i want to make her heart swirl

sometimes i wanna know how you are
it's been awhile, now that you're so far
i hope you're well
but only time will ever tell

i think about how much i miss you
and how you died too soon
it's been almost five years
and i've learned nothing is as it appears

lately, i've been getting older
making poor choices, not so sober
i want to learn from my mistakes
i've felt a lot of heartbreak

i just wanted to let you know how i am
how i've grown to try and understand
all i want is to somehow make you proud
i wish you were here right now

maybe you would get me
maybe you could be the only one to see
that i'm too in my head
and sometimes i wish i was dead

you promised to see me again
and my question was when
i slammed the phone into the wall
knowing that drugs had you long gone

next morning, it was too late
with no way for you to be saved
i wish you could've seen
the love you could've gotten from me

almost five years ago, and i still haven't let it go. i hate you.