He Left Me Breathless

Confusions and Coffee

Taeyong's POV

I have succeeded in avoiding Chanyeol sunbae for a week and now I miss him terribly. It was without a doubt, the most painful thing I had ever done and a huge, irrational part of me longed to see him so badly that I have begun to hallucinate about talking to him in the corridors and the crowded streets as if nothing had ever happened. I was barely keeping my emotions in check by reminding myself of the way our last meeting had ended.

How could I have let the situation become that outrageous and unthinkable?

How could I lose my control so quickly?

I had endured far worse temptations being around him and yet my restraint has snapped like a dried up twig in that moment.

For almost two years I had carefully hidden my feelings from him, forever hovering between the role of a naive dongsaeng and the hoobae who relied on him to the point of excessive. I had never minded either. They had both been my gateway to being close to him and basking in the glow of his company that I, otherwise could never have, enjoyed. 

But that was in the past.

Of all the friggin times in my life why did I have to get a boner then? I had not only made my intentions glaringly obvious but also disrespected Chanyeol Sunbae's brilliant art in the process.

To be honest I have never lacked for attention from men, if anything I always whined about attracting too much of it. 

Once while I was having a meal in Mc. Donald's, I had accidentally dropped sauce on my fingers and loath to the idea of wasting, I was doing a great job of licking it off. Little did I know that the stranger in the opposite booth misunderstood it as a sexual hint and reciprocated by ogling as though he'd jump me even if I blinked.

And then there was this another instance when I was wrestling a disobedient party streamer and this senior just had to help me because he couldn't watch me struggle. In truth I was hoping Chanyeol sunbae would offer to help but it had garnered the courtesy of an unwanted person.

I could go on and on but the list would be pointlessly detailed. I was used to people hitting on me and didn't pretend to be shocked anymore but instead, chose to reject their advances with an apology.

Why then did I act like a helpless and starved human around Chanyeol sunbae?

Why did my heart race at his smiles, stomach clench at his touch and breath disappear at his words?

I hadn't planned to fall for him but when the rest of my classmates had decided that the devil may care attitude bothered them to no extent and wished to decorate my body in numerous bruises, Chanyeol Sunbae had intervened like a lone defender without any care for his own safety.

He became my hero then.

He didn't have to but he did.

In the beginning I was simply interested in showing how much I worshiped and respected him. I would have swallowed pins and needles if he had wanted me to; such was my blinding faith in him. I didn't recognize that somewhere along the lane my faithful devotion had transformed into this rush of affection, adoration and attachment.

I was in love with Chanyeol Sunbae who regarded me as a spoiled kid. Well that spoiled kid who gotten an erection because of him. 

Way to go Lee Taeyong way to go.

Now I would never be able to stand beside him and I only had myself to blame. This was a scenario I confronted in my wildest nightmares but now, it has become my reality.