Tainted Happiness {Formerly Returned} (Book 4) (Completed)

Chapter 5

Dave POV

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I was a monster. I hadn't meant to kill Vince. He got in my way and I reacted. It was only after the fact that I realized what I did. I already felt like an outsider, being the only known vampire of my kind. I didn't act on thought, I acted on impulse. Most of the time I felt guilty for my actions afterward. A small part of me knew that I could change my ways, but I just didn't know how. I remembered how I used to be, but I felt like I didn't know how to become a good person. It was like the person I used to be was just a dream and this was the true me, a monster. For once, I truly hated myself. I knew that this wasn't the way I was meant to be. I was meant to be a good person and there was someone out there who was going to be able to show me how to be a good person again. I wished that that person were Kait, but there was no way that she was going to even think about helping me after what I did to her. For the first time, I completely gave up on the world and retreated back into the secluded cave I lived in at East Harbor State Park.

Only a select few people knew about these caves. They were discovered many years ago by the children of a family who would eventually become park volunteers. There was nothing other than bats, bugs, and me living there. No one knew I was living there. I was only managing to remain undetected because I'd hide deeper in the caves during the day. They weren't very big, in height anyway. No one but me knew how far they spanned. Somehow I managed to be able to shift into a bat to be able to get into some of the smaller areas. My life was a mess. I was either out somehow hurting the love of my life or sitting in these caves to rot.

I didn't deserve to live. I was nothing but a monster who couldn't figure out how to control himself. I wondered just when my seemingly perfect life went up in flames. I had it all, a loving wife, four kids, a nice house, nice cars, a decent job, money, everything was perfect. Then I put my dick before my brain and cheated on the one woman who had truly loved me unconditionally. I was at the lowest point I'd ever been in.

Before I knew what was happening, I burst out of my cave and ran to god knew where. I didn't know until I arrived there. I didn't stop running until I was at my ex-wife's doorstep. All I knew was that I was determined to beg forgiveness or die trying. I knocked twice before someone looked through the peephole and sighed as her eye turned Strigoi red. The door opened to reveal Kait's entire fleet of Viu and Guardians ready to attack at the first sign of trouble. I forgot what I was at her doorstep for. I saw Melanie with tears streaming down her beautiful, porcelain face, tears I caused. These people would never even think twice about accepting any sort of apology from me. I saw Cory step out of the crowd and rest his hand on Kait's shoulder.

"Haven't you caused this household enough pain yet?" I heard Kait whisper.

All I could do was stand there. I was speechless from the apparent suffering of that household, all caused by me. Melanie's kids eventually made their way next to their mother, crying about as much as she was. I never meant any of them harm. When I saw Maria, Jacob, and Mason, my knees got weak and I crumpled into a heap on Kait's doorstep. I began weeping for the first time since Kait showed me the pain of her childhood. I half expected Kait to kneel down next to me and comfort me, but she just stood there with that stone cold Guardian face that she so often had. Somehow, Cory got ballsy for the first time, taking a knife and slitting my throat from ear to ear. It healed almost instantly and before I knew what I was doing, I grabbed Cory by the neck and proceeded to do the same thing to him that I did to Vince. For once, I understood why I thought I was a monster.

The look on my ex-wife's face when I grabbed him was my breaking point. Her eyes got wide with shock, then turned a shade of blood red. I half expected her to attack me, but instead she fainted. Everyone walked over to her, including me. She fainted, but her eyes were still open and rather than red or gold like I was used to, they were the Welling cerulean blue. She was breathing, but showed no signs of being conscious.

"She's definitely alive, but there's no one home." Rose said, waving her hand in front Kait's face.

"You did this to her! This is your fault! You're a monster! Get out of this house! Why the hell are you even here?! Every time you come around, either someone gets killed or some other bad thing happens! You killed Vince, scared Sydney half to death, you killed Cory, and now Kait is in a coma-like state! What is wrong with you?! Just leave!" Melanie shouted at me.

"I never meant to hurt her." I said, running out the door back to my secluded East Harbor State Park caves.