Bitten

Ch. 8

Thankfully, Gir had managed to follow instructions for once and retrieved the bags of clothes at the park (along with an unfortunate hot dog stand owner's entire stock). Dib had prepared waffles for himself and Zim as it was one of the few Earth foods the alien could stomach, and Dib made some pretty kick ass waffles, if he didn't say so himself. In fact, he was just sliding a second waffle onto Zim's plate when a demented little robot came crashing through the door, landing on Dib with sparks and hot dogs flying.

Dib sighed, then stood up to wipe the hot dogs off of himself, with Gir clinging to his leg. “HI, MARY! YOU LOOK ALL BETTER NOW!!!” the delighted robot squealed.

“Gir, get off of the Dib!” Zim commanded. “Humorous as this situation may be, he's still healing.”

The lanky teenager shrugged. “I feel fine now. Even my headache-” Gir jumped onto his head and giggled. “Shit.”

Zim laughed and took another bite of his admittedly scrumptious waffle. “Yeah, have fun with that.”

Dib groaned and tried to pry the Gir unit off, but that didn't really work, and he just ended up falling flat on his ass. He also tried to tell the robot to get off nicely, but Gir wasn't having it.

“No, I like you! You smells like a puppy! And tacos!”

Tacos? That gave Dib an idea. “Hey, Gir,” he said slyly, “Did you know there's a new taco joint across town?”

“What?! Where?!” he asked, eagerly looking around.

“By the bank on Mane street,” Dib said, “Take a left at the corner of-”

“Left, bank, tacos, bye!!” Gir yelled, screaming as he charged out the door and began his quest to find tacos.

“That was just evil,” Zim said with a grin. “I liked it.”

“I wasn't lying; there really is a new taco place by the bank. But it is gonna be nice to have him out of the house for a while. After all, he's a bit destructive,” Dib said, gesturing to the broken door and hotdogs that littered the floor. “He's sweet, though. You're lucky to have him, even if he is nuts.”

Zim stared thoughtfully at his fork and nodded. He had never thought of Gir as much more than an insane servant, but the little robot did have his charm. 'Maybe I should be nicer to Gir . . .' the Irken thought. 'Even if he wrecks my base all the time . . .'

“Are you done with breakfast?” Dib asked, scooping up the bags of clothes that were on the floor and throwing a hotdog out of one of them.”

“Hm? Yeah,” Zim said, grabbing his empty plate and throwing it into the sink's incinerator. “Why?”

Dib blinked as flames engulfed the plate and reduced it to ash. He'd have to get used to that. “Well, I was gonna go change. I need a shower, too, but you don't have water here. I think I'll go to a hotel or something and use theirs,” he said, looking at the gap in the wall where there was once a door.

“Wait,” the alien said, antennae perking up as he thought. “I use the electric power and internet access of my pathetic neighboring humans. I could add a water line; it would only take seconds for the base to connect the pipes and create a bathroom for you.” He walked over to the cabinet and grabbed a small electronic padd, scribbling as Dib spoke.

“Wouldn't it just be easier for me to go shower elsewhere? If you hate water so much, you shouldn't have it in your house,” Dib puzzled. “Well, except for the bottles I keep in my room to drink. Still, wouldn't it inconvenience-”

“It's already begun,” Zim said, and the vampire detected vibration under his feet; the pipes were connecting underground as line's from Zim's base attached to his neighbor's water supply. The Irken cackled at the thought of their raised water bills and drew a bathroom on his padd, initiating the command to make an add-on to his beloved home. The windows rattled, and a room popped out of the ground outside, connecting to