Dear Boys...

Chapter 7: Why Are We So Goddamn Difficult??

Yes guys, we know we're hard to handle sometimes. It's a fact that we all live with and most don't like to admit to. 

We're difficult. 

But why?

Well as I'm sure you've noticed there's not exactly a clear easy answer when it comes to female rationality. However, there are some general points that come up when this question is asked.

So, why are we difficult?

Well first off, many of us subconsciously (or not, sometimes) want to test a man's strength and care. 

I'll give you an example that I have done to a guy (the poor dude). 

I got upset at something he said. I was passive aggressive about it and when he didn't notice I got even more angry. He asked what was wrong, I snapped at him and said it was nothing. He got upset because there was clearly something bothering me. I made a snide remark about how he doesn't care and blah blah blah.

Yes this is unfair and, well, difficult. 

But in a way this was a test. A test to see if the guy would stay with me through the bad times. Because if he didn't I would be risking heartbreak. 

Girls (and guys) can be very cautious with their hearts. 

Marina And The Diamonds explains a woman's mindset when it comes to relationships in her song How To Be A Heartbreaker. I suggest you go listen to it. It might give you some insight. 

Ladies will put you through a series of exams to see what your reaction will be.

Another example of my own:

I was with someone I was soon to be engaged to. He was saving up for the ring. He wanted to get a tattoo and I told him to use the ring money to pay for the tattoo. I wanted to see what he would say and that would (in my mind) reflect his priorities. 

Crazy? Yes. Effective? Definitely.

Besides testing, there are just times when we girls are frustrating. We don't know what we want and then we do and then we don't and then we do and then we don't. You try really hard to please us, but it's hard to please us when we don't know what will please us. We recognize this. 

Hang in there, though.