We walked quickly up the back steps of the stage, handing our guitars to two techs. I snuck around the corner, pulling my only extra smooth out of my back pocket and lighting it, taking a long drag. I watched the rest of the boys, discluding Angelo, who was already on the stage setting up his drums, hand their things to the other techs. Chris was on the phone, talking furiously to someone. I pressed the cancer stick firmly between my lips and walked over towards him.
"I don't care," He was saying. "stay away from her."
I gave him a confused look and he held up a finger, just a minute. I watched his face grow more and more furious as whoever he was talking to pleaded against his words.
"Don't go near her again." Chris hissed before handing the phone to our manager. We weren't allowed to carry anything in our pockets when we went on stage, because they might fall out. Tim reached out his hand towards me and I sighed, handing him my phone, my empty pack of smokes, and my lighter before sitting next to Chris on the steps.
"Who was that?" I asked, taking another long drag.
He mumbled something I couldn't understand and turned away from me. I grabbed his shoulder tightly, forcing him to face me.
"It was Ryan." He sighed, defeated.
A lump rose in my throat. "What did he want?"
He sighed again, resting his elbows on his knees and interlocking his fingers. "He wanted to know where you were. He's at Warped today, and he was looking for you. He'll probably be watching our set.." He looked down at me.
I closed my eyes. "I think I'm gonna be sick again." I whispered.
"We have about twenty minutes." He said, grabbing my hand. We ran swiftly to the nearest bathroom. Chris went inside with me, even though it was strictly a woman's bathroom. He held my hair away from my face as I got sick once again.
We got back to the stage just in time. As soon as we climbed the steps, the tech handed me my guitar. I pulled the strap over my head and strummed a few notes, though my fingers were shaking terribly.
Chris leaned down and hugged my gently, careful not to hit my guitar. "You can do this, I know you can." He said, smiling and playfully flicking my nose.
I smiled up at him, taking a deep breath. Before I knew it, Ricky, Devin, and I were running on the stage as the crowd went crazy. I avoided making eye contact with anyone in the crowd, in fear that I might see Ryan. Chris, Balz, and Angelo were right behind us. I studied all of the signs being held up in the crowd. A few even had my name on them.
I knew our setlist by heart, so I was ready for us to play Immaculate Misconception. Chris got the crowd pumped up, and then we started.
"What the fuck?
Put your teeth to the curb, cause right now I'm gonna stomp your fucking face in
I hope you drown in all the cum you fucking swallow, to get yourself to the top
You're just a trend, just a fucking disease,
How could you look at yourself in the mirror?
You stand for nothing and your heart is untrue
Every single thing about you's just a clone of the last "you".
All I want is to reach someone,
to say something that could change their life forever
To let them know they're not alone, you're not alone
