Kore || A Hades and Persephone Retelling

VIII. Denial

 - Demeter -

Since Kore's move to Hagneai, I had been busier than ever. The distance between us was taking its toll, but I refused to show it. I kept myself occupied, constantly traveling, constantly answering prayers.

I sighed, brushing my hair back. It wasn't hard to see why this separation was so hard. Some critics, like that blasted Zeus, complained that my connection with Kore was unhealthy..

"And," I admitted to myself, "To an extent, that was true."

But before the last year came along, Kore and I were thick as thieves. After all, Kore was several hundred years old by mortal time, and while relatively young by immortal standards, that was a lot of time to spend with someone day in and day out.

I sat in our empty house, weaving a blanket for Kore's return as tears pricked my eyes. "They don't understand," I mumbled to myself.

Life had not been kind to me. I had become fixated on Kore's wellbeing because she was the one bright spot in my life.

My mind wandered to the suffered extreme abuse and mistreatment I had suffered from immortals and humans alike- from foolish mortals tempting and tricking me into helping them hurt another, to the violation I suffered by my oldest brother, Zeus.

I shuddered, unwanted thoughts of that terrifying night playing through my mind. Kore had been the result of that  horrific violation.  I thought about that day more often than I should, and the remembrance typically came in nightmares. The night I had left Kore was one such night that the nightmares found easy access.

My thoughts wandered to the dream as my hands effortlessly continued the weaving, my heart pounding as I pictured the scene in my mind..

The pounding of hooves..a wild scream..a desperate sprint to get away. I could feel myself aching and hurting, despite my godly strength, desperate to flee from my older brother, taken form as a bull. "Please," I begged pointlessly. "Don't do this- go back to your wife, go back to Themis! I have no desire for you, please!"

That had been years and years ago, when Zeus was still with his first wife. For years after that, I would have that nightmare every time I closed my eyes. Ever time I awoke in a cold sweat, heart pounding and eyes wide with fright.

It always took a moment for me to realize that I was not in that forsaken woodland so long ago. I was safe in my home, there atop Olympus.

My bottom lip trembled before I buried my face into my hands, the sobs breaking the silence of the marble palace.

I had wanted to die that day. I had not yet known love, and had stayed far from the idea of consorts as I focused on my job to help the growth and harvests of the Earth. I had never even been with someone because I didn't want it to mean nothing like it did to so many others.

Zeus had shattered any romantic notion I had that night, and permanently marred any familial relationship we once shared.

I'm no fool- I know my situation was not unique. Hundreds have fallen prey to Zeus, including his third wife of several hundred years, Hera. But that didn't ease the pain, nor did it stop the nightmares or the intense feelings of rage I still felt towards the god.

And now, he is trying to take my daughter from me.

I leaned against my chair, taking deep breaths as I tried to calm herself down. My hands went absentmindedly to my stomach as my mind went through the story.

It was after that horrific night that I discovered I was pregnant. Terrified after the attack, I had hidden far away along the shore from Zeus and anyone else who would know my shame when I had realized what was taking place.

It had taken some time to get used to, but that little baby became my whole world. I smiled as I thought back to the day Kore was born. The world was washed in green, and my happiness causing everything to shoot from the ground and blossom.

That sweet baby girl saved me. I had marched back to Olympus, glowing with pride, a beautiful child in my arms. I chuckled as I remembered my bravery- I had the gall to interrupt the Great Council. I was a powerful and fierce woman formed from the shattered girl I had been. I could remember how my deep colored eyes seemed on fire that day as I stared down Zeus, who was squirming under Hera's sudden glare. "I present Kore, Goddess of Spring and Renewal," I had declared. "Daughter of Zeus."

Things did eventually calm down afterwards, even if the aftermath took some mending between Zeus and his enraged wife. Kore was the jewel of the court, always such a sweet-tempered and darling thing. Her dark skin was flawless, and she would smile for anyone- even Hades, I remembered with some amusement. He was such an ornery and rather rude man that most ignored him, but Kore loved everyone equally.

"Of course," I said to myself, lost in memory. "As Kore grew, things were no different."

I fondly remembered how we were always, not because I forced Kore, but because the girl wanted to be close to her mother. We would visit the harvests, and I patiently cultivated Kore's budding power and talent. We had played countless hours in her meadow, and life had been perfect. We laughed and smiled together, and never fought.

Just recently Kore had started to rebel- a phase Athena and Hera assured all went through, and would soon end, but I wasn't too sure. I frowned as I went back to weaving, my heart feeling the intense pain of growth.

Lately, there was more tense moments and cutting words than had ever been said between us. I could only pray Hagneia brought Kore back to her senses. We were as close as any mother and daughter...but we were also dear friends. I know I was overprotective, but I also saw the sideways glances and heard the lewd comments of the other gods.

"I can't let Kore be taken away and mistreated like I was," I told myself. "I won't allow such heartache and self-loathing to come to my little girl- not now, not ever."

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Oh, poor Demeter breaks my heart!

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