PREFRENCES. (asoue !)

you bring home a snake

i was just reading a prefrence book and it seemed interesting

Louis
-louis ain't havin it
-"LOUIS I BROUGHT A SNAKE HOME"
-"funny. it sounded like you brought a snake home"
-"i did."
-"wHaT?!"
-"i named it joyce. what a cute name."
-"WHERE'S THE HOLY WATER?"
-"wot."
-"I NEED TO CLENSE THIS ENTIRE HOUSE BECAUSE OF THAT!!" *pointe to joyce*
-"you suck. joyce is adorable!"
-"snakes are only adorable in the jungle book!"
-"well the man in the van said that joyce is a one of a kind."
-"YOU GOT IT FROM A VAN???"
-"yeah."

Malina
-pretty chill with it
-"malina i have a snake and i'm keeping it."
-"cool. what's its name?"
-"bob."
-"wait why did you bring it home?"
-"cause i found it agressive and i thought of you."
-bob: *hisses*
-"damn if i were a snake i'd want that thing to have my children."
-*you whisper to the snake* replace me and you'll be in a zoo. 
bob:*hisses loudly*

Avi
-you hate snakes, she hates snakes, no one dies and we all live happily ever after 

Dylan
-like louis, expect worse
-"baby! i brought a snake home!"
-"yOu dId wHaT?!"
-"can she sleep with us tonight?!"
-"tf?! i don't need another body next to me!" 
-"but she doesn't bite..."
-"WELL SHE CAN CHOKE YOU!"
-"you don't know that! gretchen is a garden snake, their harmless."
-"yOu nAmEd iT gReTcHeN?!"
-"yes! now she's our child meaning she's your daughter!"
-"i want that thing put up for adoption." 
-"dylan! don't say that about your daughter!"
-"that thing isn't my kid! you didn't birth it!"
-"if i did would you still put it up for adoption?!"
-"yEs!"
-"god your a horrible dad!"
-"IM NOT AGREEING TO BE THAT DEVIL'S DAD!"