&BURN ◊ GD

CHAPTER THREE

aurora
where the girl finally snaps

sometimes i feel like a ticking time bomb, like i'm ready to explode at any moment from the slightest trigger. and i believed that had developed over time when my sadness was replaced with anger. however, i knew that it would soon be surfaced to others when it finally runs out of time. "oh my god, i'm such a hoe for brownies." my thoughts become interrupted with the moaning of cora in the corner of the room where she holds the plastic container of pastries.

my eyebrows become furrowed when her eyes are screwed in pure bliss, however suddenly realization hits me. "are those my brownies, you're eating?"

"hey, you know what, i don't like that tone of voice you got there? i'm your best friend, what's mine is mine and what's yours is also mine." she tells me with her mouth still filled the brown pieces of food and i have to laugh to actually comprehend the way she thinks her statement was true.

"cora keep eating my brownies and i'll make you a hoe for death."

"too late, already am." she answers when she wipes her mouth and sticks out her tongue at me. i was just finishing up my last essay of the semester and my laptop was sat on my lap when i flipped her off in the process of still typing.

"so what are we doing today?"

"nothing." i shortly chuckle and she groans when falling back onto to her bed.

"but i want to go somewhere." she whines and i scoff when finally handing in the essay for the class to then shut my laptop.

"then go without me."

"you know i'm incapable of doing that, we're attached to the hip." she jokes and i shake my head when smirking from her words. "there's a bonfire tonight, let's go." cora suddenly says when she sits up with hope in her eyes.

"absolutely not." i state and she frowns.

"c'mon, please, aurora." she begs and i refuse to look in her direction due to her obvious pout that would be prominent on her lips. however when i glance to her i can see the facial features that effects me when i groan.

"fine!" i state irritatingly and she cheers when she begins to dance a little as she sits. once she is done with her movements she stands and walks to her draws where clothes are held.

"this is going to be fun, i promise."

"yeah, well, i have a feeling it's not going to be. me and parties don't do so well." i admit with a soft sigh as she snorts to herself in the process of examining different styles of clothes.

"tell me about it, girly. it's like shit purposely just happens to you at public events." — a/n; it's because it does, i have no other ideas or enough brain capacity to find another place for drama to happen at — i know cora had meant her comment as lightheartedly as possible but due to the recent events of the past beginning to sneak up on me, i couldn't help but to dwell on her words. the moment each time a get together was held brought pain that i regretted and have wanted to forget took place.

"cora," i start off, faintly saying her name when i think to myself on the way my own thoughts become an enemy. "i'm not a good person, right? like after everything i have done in my past, it doesn't make a good person." in the process of my words cora furrows her eyebrows. because of my voice it had caused her to be worried from my explanation and i do not blame due to her prior knowledge of my mental illnesses.

"aurora, why would you think that-"

"because it's true. i was a horrible person in high school and as much as people were horrible to me, it was no excuse. i hated who i was and i don't want to be that way anymore. and i don't know maybe it's this whole past thing that's suddenly coming up but i feel like i'm just going to be this bad person forever." i ramble on becoming dejected by the way this thought of myself had been lingering on my mind for quite some time.