The Boxer and the Blogger

Chapter Ten: Lies and Awkward Family Dinners -Part Two-

Chapter Ten: Lies and Awkward Family Dinners —Part Two—

  “I’m not wearing that abomination!” Grayson hissed.

Arsen looked at the full suit I picked out. “I don’t know. I kinda like it.” He snatched the bowtie from my hands and held it up to his neck. “Makes me look like James. James Bond.”

I sighed anxious to get back home and give myself a pep talk before this horrid dinner.

“Look, if you wear jeans and that explicit shirt my aunt will chew you up, spit you out and dance on your grave.” I gave Grayson a pointed look. “I’m sure of it.”

He crossed his arms offended. “I think I can handle a bitter old lady, Matum.”

“Yeah, that’s what her husband said and you don’t see him coming to these family dinners anymore.” I mumbled underneath my breath.

A terrified look passed over Arsen’s face. “Grayson, maybe you should just wear the suit. Ladies love a man in a suit” he looked at me and wiggled his eyebrows. “Right, Tatum?”

Grayson shot him an icy look. “Whose side are you on?”

Arsen held his hands up in defense. “Hey, I’m just saying! She sounds like the type of old lady who castrates young men if she doesn’t like them and I happen to like my balls intact!”

I banged my head against the rack of hangers. “You know what?! I don’t care what you do Grayson!” I whipped my head towards Arsen. “Get the dang suit on so we can leave!” I exploded. “Or else I will be the one to castrate you both!”

Both of the boys look terrified.

But not as terrified as I was when I realized I had twenty eight missed phone calls from Travis all stating that I was late for dinner.

*****

“You’re late.” Travis deadpanned. He quickly closed the front door so we were all standing outside on the porch. He looked frantically from Grayson to Arsen. “And why is only one of them in a suit. I thought I told you to have them both dressed nicely!”

“I am dressed nicely.” Grayson said.

Travis took in his attire. “Yeah, because a naked lady and Corona beer plastered across your shirt is classy.” Sarcasm saturated every word.

“I do what I—”

I grabbed Grayson’s ear and yanked his down to eyelevel. “Shut up, shut up, shut up!” I hissed from in between clenched teeth. “You’ve done enough already!” I finished and pushed him back.

I turned towards Travis, my nerves on edge. “How much time?”

Travis checked his phone. “You have exactly ten minutes and forty-five seconds until Aunt Carol finishes grilling mom about why she married dad how much of a low-life he is.” He gave me an apologetic look. “But that’s best case scenario.”

“Okay, I can work with that.” I mumbled. “Travis, you take Arsen and I’ll try to fix Grayson.”

Travis nodded and ushered Arsen into the house. I took a deep breath and turned towards Grayson.

“Here’s the plan.” I mustered up my most serious face. “We need to get into Travis’s room so I can find some acceptable clothes for you to wear.”

“This is very much acceptable.” He interrupted.

I held my hand up. We didn’t have the time for this. “Yeah, maybe acceptable for hitting up the bar at two in the morning.”  I continued. “Like I was saying, we need to get into Travis’s room, but we can’t go inside the house. The only way we can get into his room is by the window.” I pointed to the large window at the very top of the house.