Shadowfire

Chapter 51

"Will, come on man you're spiralling here. I know you, you need to cut this self destructive bullshít, that's not you" but his impassioned plea was ineffectual. His best friend just looked tired, bone weary. He seemed to have aged ten years in the week S- Shadis, Shadis not Leah, had been on earth. His eyes were lined and deep purple smudges had etched themselves into his face. He hadn't been sleeping, barely eaten with inanimate actions, listless. He was untethered. His whole life he had had a purpose, been a leader and a fighter, inspiring great feats from his men. Now he had nothing to go on for.
"Dad please" Annabelle was by Epps' side, the two of them trying to plead with Lennox. But it was as if they were talking to a blank wall, they weren't even sure if he could hear them. Annabelle turned to face Epps, pulling him away from her father.
"Shad's already been gone 10 years, why now-"
"He'd grieved for her when he thought she was dead Belle, of course he did but he knew he needed to keep going- he had to keep all of us safe, had to reintegrate us with command. His daughter was dead. And now she's not. She's gone, but she's right there. Don't you understand?"
"Of course I do! She's my sister. We watched her disappear into a hole in the sky, watched it close and siphon her off into the vacuum of space. You have no idea how many times I wanted her to fall back out of the sky, how many times I tried to believe that Rapidflare was right and she was alive but no one can survive in empty space. But it makes no difference if something in a vaguely familiar body is here or not, my sister is dead either way"
"It makes all the difference in the world" but he couldn't explain it to her, wouldn't even try. Annabelle had only a years worth of memories with her sister, late in life; they had decades. To have her here, without her memories, not at fault but still gone– they hadn't just lost a future, they'd lost their past.

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She didn't know how to bring it up. Shad being here, but not being her, was like an open wound. Tess felt it in herself every second, that constant pain niggling at her that something was wrong, she felt it in her very core, that loss she hadn't even been consciously aware of until it kept being paraded in her face. It could only be worse for the others, she was loyal to Shadowfire in her entirety, both through her own connection and by extension of her bond with Rapidflare, but it could only be worse for those closer to her, who had grown up with her and had raised her, bound by blood. But she was loyal, and it was her duty to speak up if there was even the smallest chance.

Her research had long been thought a dead end, theoretical only, but with Belle's financial backing and Wheelie's help she had managed to meld and adapt Cybertronian technology, specialising it to work with human inventions. Her work as a theoretical neurosurgery was becoming practical, experimental technology highly volatile and dangerous. But if there was a chance–

She had to do it, had to say something. If there was even the slightest chance that they could bring Shadowfire back to them, trigger her memories, then they had to take it.

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"Yes" It was unsurprising, she was barely halfway through her explanation and Lennox was already agreeing, expression grim and eyes red. He looked old and ragged, a haunted look to his face as he seemed to stare through things. But maybe for the first time in too long there was the spark of something in his eyes, some comprehension– still dull but growing stronger.
"The risks-" she began but Sam cut her off.
"Could it work?"
"I don't-"
"Could it work?" He repeated, and something in his face, his desperation, compelled her to answer.
"Theoretically? Yes"
"Count me in"
"S-"
"Me too" all around her voices chimed in, offering their assent. Even Cogar was speaking up, the whole crowd united in their willingness and need to do something to at least attempt to save their friend. Tess supposed she should've expected this. Shad was a person who inspired loyalty, taking after her father she put her friends' lives before her own; they knew she would do anything to save them, move heaven and earth for her family, and now it was their turn to repay her.