The Big Bad Wolves | Paul Lahote

CHAPTER SIX ' fire-lit nights '

TW: SELF-HARM, PANIC ATTACK, ANXIETY

☽ kiara black ☾

       "She hit you! You let Bella hit you? No . . . no way!" Kiara exclaimed as Paul recalled the story when Bella tried defending Jacob, not knowing that his mood swings were due to his recent transformation as a wolf. She continued to laugh hard until Paul smacked her back to which she retaliated by hitting his head.

       "Hey, it's not funny, Kitty." He said sternly before giving in and joining her in laughter, the packet of buns he held in his hand almost falling. Later that night, a council meeting was to be held and Seth, Paul and Kiara were tasked with preparing the food although Seth was too busy sneaking away some of the snacks.

"I'm sorry! But, wow, you must've gotten pretty angry, huh?" Kiara remarked as he ruffled his hair, scents of refreshing orange and wood, from sparring around with Jared and Embry, filling her nose. She inhaled gladly, placing a packet of insanely large marshmallows on top of chocolate bars and graham crackers.

       "Of course, you know me. Sam tried holding me back but I turned and nearly attacked Bella. Then me and your brother got into a bit of a scuffle. Turned into a mess." His dark eyes focused on the flames of the campfire outside, his mind wandering around and imagining the disastrous consequences if he had hurt the human. "It's ironic how I'm advising and teaching you when I can barely control myself."

"We're in this together. Always, Paul."

       The boy then turned to her with his big brown eyes, hand reaching out. She let him caress her cheek as he leant forward with his other hand on the kitchen counter beside the girl's waist. Their tender lips barely touching. Kiara felt chills around her body as Paul snaked his arm around her waist, their pulses racing like horses around a track. Lips suddenly touched and the wolves found themselves kissing slowly and gently, a movement uncommon to them. Kiara ran her hand through Paul's hair, wanting more and more.

"Hey, hey, slow down there," Paul chuckled, cupping the girl's face as she smiled shyly.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be, babe," Paul smiled as Kiara's cheeks turned rose pink at the nickname. He cupped her face, using his thumb to caress her cheek, and their eyes bore into each other's once more and asked, "Kiara, will you be my—"

"Paul, stop." Kiara felt a sudden ill feeling in her stomach.

       Did he really try to ask me that? she thought. In the moment, all she felt was lust but now hearing him ask to be his girlfriend?

       It was way too soon and she was too busy trying to work on improving herself than to be in a relationship she wasn't prepared for; neither was Paul. The girl removed his hands from her face and despite the sound of her name being called out by Paul, she hurriedly entered her room and made sure to lock the door.

       Sitting in the corner of her room, Kiara brought her knees to her chest and rocked back and forth, tears running down her face. Her breathing becoming more erratic and her nails frantically pinching at the skin of her right wrist, desperately trying to compose herself. Her toes curling as she tried to tense her body to calm down. Paul stood on the other side of the door, his knocking being drowned out by the incessant thoughts in Kiara's head and his own too.

       What's wrong with me? Why can't I be normal?

       "Kiara, there's nothing wrong with you I promise you that. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have done that and I shouldn't have asked you such a question. It was stupid of me. Is there anything I can do to help?" Paul heard nothing from the girl whether it was her voice or her thoughts. "I'll leave you alone but if there's anything you need at all, just come to me okay? Or your brother or your dad, it doesn't have to be me."

       "Get out of my head, Paul!"

       Kiara heard notning further until she heard his footsteps moving away from her bedroom. She heard his thoughts; full of hurt but not of his own pain but of hers. Knowing that he hurt her upset Paul though Kiara knew it wasn't him. It was her head overthinking everything as if her own mind wanted to destroy any thought of her being happy. Not only did she have to fight the urge to phase in situations that triggered her but her head too.

       Once she had calmed down a bit, she decided to move to her bed and lie there the entire night, the smell of the campfire and barbecue filling her room. Kiara declined any invitation for anyone to come in, even Bella who had tagged along with Jacob. She couldn't face Paul, who had stayed on the patio just in case she needed someone to be with her, she was too afraid and embarrassed.

       The girl clung onto a small stuffed bear her father had gifted her as a child, nuzzling into its comfort as she fell into a deep sleep. The thoughts of worry and fear floated around her as she dreamt of a world where she could control her phasing, her temper, how she felt and her feelings towards not only her friends and family but the boy whom she thought had feelings for.

a/n

i am so so sorry to everyone who has longed for an update! life just hit me like a truck and writing just wasn't on my mind but i'm hoping i'll be able to write more though i won't be posting often and again i apologise for that as well as how short this chapter is.

i hope everyone is okay especially during these times so please stay safe!

thank you for reading <3