How To Train Your Boyfriend

Chapter 16: He's Hopeless

He's Hopeless

James showed up at seven. Sharp. And I couldn't have been more proud.

"That is a dress, Button." James said when I opened my front door to reveal his smiling face.

I looked down at the yellow sundress I wore. At first glance, it was relatively plain. It wasn't until you saw the back, low-cut with thin straps that crossed down my spine, that it became more than just your average dress. I smiled, happy with the purchase and even more happy with the compliment.

"Thank you," I beamed. "You don't look so bad yourself."

And he didn't. James Hadley was the kind of person who managed to pull everything off. He had the same fashionable grace that was usually reserved for celebrities or animated characters who wore the same thing flawlessly on repeat. It was equally frustrating as it was endearing. You could put him in a suit made out of a collage of Dwayne Johnson's face, and everyone in the room would just shrug and say, "Yeah, he pulls it off".

Currently he was wearing dark jeans, a plain, dark green t-shirt, and brown shoes. It was simple, and yet would effectively work on every girl he came into contact with that night.

"How am I doing so far?" James said, running a finger through his windblown hair. His hair had a habit of going every which-way in the wind, defying all laws of gravity and resulting in an electrocuted look that he, of course, also managed to pull off.

"Pretty well. But we have to cover every base . . ." I couldn't hold my smile as I took a step back into my house, leaving James confused in the doorway. I turned my head and yelled, "Mom!"

Immediately, James' face went pale. It was the kind of expression that you see in horror movies moments before the victims are violently murdered by the killer. He was being sent to his grave and, being that it was my mother, it was a very appropriate expression.

"We never said anything about parents," he hissed as my mother's footsteps became louder and louder.

I grinned at him. "Every. Base."

"That better also mean first, second, and third. Maybe even a home run, because I am not meeting any parents without - Ms Wright!"

My mother appeared over my shoulder and James straightened and smiled at her. My mother was the type of woman that, somehow, managed to keep a structured, poised appearance, despite anything thrown her way. It was a Sunday night and here she was, hair pulled back and heels on, ready for a business meeting with a mob boss or a night in watching the Bachelor. Who could tell?

"James, is it?" She asked, her voice smooth and low, and not at all like the one I inherited. While my mother's voice mimicked the tranquil noise of the ocean, mine more closely resembled water tumbling down a rocky stream or even a crowded community pool with screaming seven year olds. I lacked her poise in every way.

"Yes ma'am." James gave her a signature smile. His smiles usually worked on women, no matter what age, but my mom was not a woman. She was part machine, part Amazon, and would not be fooled by a pretty boy with glowing skin and shining eyes.

"Where are you going tonight?" She tilted her chin and stared at him with piercing blue eyes. Those, I've been told, I did inherit. However, I couldn't work them the same way that she could. She stared at him the same way a lioness stares at her prey, and James was noticeably affected.

"We're going to dinner," he answered, glancing briefly at me.

One eyebrow lifted. "Where?"

"Sushi."