All of Me

twenty two • say a little prayer

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I hate my boss. It's all I can think as I eat breakfast on Friday morning, sulking over my cereal. It's not a new revelation, but it's ringing louder in my ears today. Last week, I asked to either switch shifts or finish early today, just so Liam and I could leave after class, but Rich said no.

Apparently, we take advantage of him and walk all over him, like it makes any difference to him whether it's Georgie or me behind the checkout. I wasn't asking for much. I even explained the situation to him, that Liam and I planned to drive down to Cincinnati after class, but he didn't care. I tried to switch with Georgie anyway, but he found out and threatened to fire both of us for undermining his authority.

So now I have to work until closing tonight. I can't leave the bookstore until a quarter after ten, and it's a three hour drive to Liam's house. I tried bargaining with Rich, then flat out arguing, but it became pretty clear that I was about to be fired, so I dropped it and told Liam to go alone.

He said no. He wants me there. He wants me to meet his mom, and whichever siblings are there. The fewer the better. I'm already nervous enough. When my anger at Rich subsides, even for a moment, sickening nerves creep into my stomach instead. It's an effort to eat breakfast when it's early and my brain keeps hopping between rage and anxiety.

"Are you ok, bogárkám?" Mom asks, shooting me a worried glance over the top of her glasses, a slice of toast poised halfway to her mouth. I give her a tight smile and nod.

"Yeah, fine," I say, and a yawn bubbles up out of nowhere. "Just tired."

Her expression melts into a soft smile. "I bet. You work so hard." She puts her hand on my arm, her thumb rubbing my skin and pushing dark hairs in the wrong direction. I don't know who decided that arm hair is no big deal yet leg hair is somehow the devil, but my arms are hairy and my legs are smooth.

"Got any plans for the weekend?" Tad asks as he brings over a pan of freshly scrambled eggs, serving a spoonful onto Mom's remaining piece of toast. He proffers them to me and when I smile, he tips a portion onto my plate. Tad's scrambled eggs are to die for. The way Gray shovels them into his mouth, you'd have thought he would die without them.

I don't know what to say, but it doesn't seem to matter when Tad sits down next to Mom and kisses her cheek, looking at her like she's an angel.

"Ready?" he asks. Right after breakfast, they're driving up to some secluded cabin on Lake Huron and they won't be back until Sunday night. Mom's been buzzing about it all week, a permanent grin on her face. It's so refreshing to see, but it makes me feel even worse that she's totally in the dark about Liam.

I could tell her right now. I could just blurt it out. Drop a bombshell right before she leaves. Tell her that I'm dating a guy. A frat guy. A really cute, wonderful frat guy who makes me feel incredible.

But I don't. I watch her and Tad and I glance at Gray, who smiles back, and I focus on my eggs. I don't want to hurt her. Whenever I tell her about Liam, she'll be upset that I didn't tell her sooner, so it might as well wait until after she has a weekend away.

She needs this weekend. She more than deserves it.

"We'll head off by nine, I reckon," Tad says, checking his watch. "I can't wait to get there."

"Me neither," Mom says, leaning against him just slightly. "I'm so excited to go away for a few days." She meets my eye and sits up. "Not that I won't miss you two, of course. It'll be weird being away from you."

It's going to be really weird. I've never been away from Mom for more than a day. The night Gray and I went to the party was the longest we'd been apart, and I didn't even stay overnight. It's kind of tragic that I've never been on a sleepover, not even when I was a kid, though I don't get it. I wasn't the kind of kid to enjoy that. I'm still not.