Black Roses

chapter seven (full moon)

  I awake with  the feeling of sweat dripping down my back and forehead. I can't remember if I had a dream last night night or not. A bright light shines through the rusty blinds across the room into my eyes. Giving me the notice that its morning. I look at my legs noticing that I was covered by a black comforter, Liam had to of put it on me because I remember slowly falling asleep in his arms. This felt wrong for some reason. I remember when I was younger, Id asked my mom what she would do if I spent the night at a guys house. All she said was "I'd kill the guy you where with, even if nothing happened." Then I asked her what she would do if I sexually spent the night with a woman.  "At least you wouldn't get pregnant." Was her reply. I wanted to tell her how wrong that was, I even wanted to slap her. She means well but I can tell she dosent see me as a woman.  I'm still just a stupid child in her mind.
  I hear some keys hitting against each other out side of Liam's front door. I thought it was him so I pretended to fall back asleep. I listen to the foot steps as they creep into the kitchen and walk around to the living room behind the sofa I'm on.  The foot steps head to the door passed the hallway and I hear it open.
  "LIAM ROMAN MOON!" I hear a deep voice yells into the room. I hear a thud against the ground and my body gets chills all over. I turn my head around to see Liam walking towards me.
  "Look,  she's untouched." He quickly brushes my hair behind my ears. "Please be live me father she's only here because her mother was attacking her." He makes me sound like I'm an unharmful innocent child. 
  "Still I don't like the fact that a human stayed with you alone, I didn't give you an apartment so you could hook up with women." I blush hoping he honestly doesn't think me and Liam "did it".
  " Sir, I swear nothing happened." I say not knowing if this guy was gonna smack Liam across the face or not.
  Unexpectedly, the man starts to laugh. And hides a smile. He had the same eyes that Laim had but that was it. That's the only thing that made them look alike. "Call me Roman." He says holding his hand out. I shake it being polite as he continues to laugh at both of us. "I was speachless just seeing that some girl was on the couch, he usually scares away anyone he meets."
  I couldn't speak,  I felt to awkward. All I did was  give him a soft smile to show that nothing was wrong. I look behind him seeing Liam's head down in embarrassment. 
  "Seriously I belive you guys." Roman shakes his body as if he had goosebumps from a stormy night. "I'll come back later Liam, just don't do anything like last time." Roman turns to me and bows in an olden fashion, leaving the apartment.
  Roman shuts the door as Liam lifts his head gazing his eyes into mine. "Last time?" I ask. 
  "That's not a story for you." He snaps at me.
  "Damn, sorry I was just asking. But hey I think I should start going hom-" I suddenly without a blink nor a second passing by am slammed against the wall. "What the hell Liam?" I try pushing him off me, but it seems like he's not moving a muscle. I feel his hands roam up my wrist and grab my hands as his head is cenemeters away from my throat. His chest squeezes up against mine.
  "Once you leave here don't think about me ever again." He struggles to say gasping for air ever word.
  "Let go Liam, this isn't funny." I find my fingernails digging into his hands.
Squeezing Liam's hands harder I look him in the eyes trying to manipulate him on letting me go. It didn't work as he smells me. Still looking me dead in the eyes, his turn bloody red. Like everyones blood from the people he's killed where trapped in his eyes. "God you smell delicious." He seductively says placing his lips on my jawline. I'll admit I felt hot feeling his lips on me. They slowly lead down to the vain on my neck and he slowly licks me, moving his hand harshly and forcefully onto my throat. "LIAM STOP!" I yell pulling his hair as hard as I could with my free hand. Liam quickly falls onto his knees, and goes silent.
  "What is your problem?" I join him on the floor.
  "I don't know, I just need you to leave. Be careful with your mom and seriously just stay away from me."
  "But, your in pain. I know what it feels like and I just want to help you."
  "YOU CAN'T HELP ME!" He yells lifting his head. "YOU CAN'T EVEN HELP YOURSELF. LOOK AT YOU.  YOUR PATHETIC, YOUR LIKE EVERYONE ELSE WHO SELF HARMS. YOU JUST WANT ATTENTION AND YOUR PROBLEMS ARE FAKE JUST LIKE YOU!" He stands up and turns his back to me. His words stung. This wasn't the first time someone who knew about my self harm issues has used it against me.
  I walk myself to the front door and say one last thing before leaving. "What would you know about me?  Your just a stalker who kills innocent people for your own greed." I slam his door. I take a deep breath as I hear the door across the Hall close. I see a little girl with her mother looking at me.
  The little girl speaks, "I'm sorry you and your husband are fighting, don't give up though I'm sure he still loves you. That's what my mommy teaches me anyway." I look at the little girl and up at the mother. They remind me of myself. The mother smiles and apologies for her daughters inpolitness and walks out of the hallway. The fact that the little girl though I was fighting with my husband made me smile but I felt guilty for her, knowing that one day she's gonna grow up to realize her mother is a no good tweaker who probably puts all her mistakes on her.
  I didn't mean what I said to Liam, but he was probably being honest about me. My decision is gonna be simple. I wrote my phone number down and slid it under his door just in case. Other than that im sure my feelings that I felt last night mean nothing and I was probably just a horny virgin feeling something freaky. So I'll just push those feelings in the back of my head and forget about them.
  I get home as I'm aprouched quickly by my mom in the living room.
  "Abby where were you I called hundred of times." She states.
  "24 times mom, and I didnt want to answer when I knew all I was gonna get was a phone call of an angry mother screaming at my dumbass."
  "Honey don't call your self a dumbass," She walks over to me and hugs me. "I'm sorry for what happened last night and I promise things are going to change from this." I've heard this all before, over a million times. Nothing ever changes with me and her. She stays the same while I try and pretend like she's actually going to change. Ive even tried crying to her his I feel bit she just didn't change. So I'm done pretended. I bite my tongue and nod my head agreeing with her.
  I head up to my room, seeing that's its only noon. I didn't have enough energy to go cut myself. So I just sat on my bed, stuck in my thoughts I could only thing about what Liam said and how I still want it help him. Even though he was right about how I can't even help myself. I check the weather on my phone, I have an app for the moon faze. Tonight is a full moon. There's something about the moon that I just relate to. Ive always been memorized by it, witch was just another way that made me weird at school. I take a nap waiting for the sun to set so I can watch the moon for a while.
  I usually just set a blanket down on in the field behind our house, I just lay there and escape from reality. Playing Lana Del Rey or some sad shit. But tonight was different, I still thought about Liam. Like some fucking teenage romance girl cliche. I hated it. I hated myself. I hated life. The wind was calm and breezy making the sent from the flowers flow all around me. The moon was bright enough to the point where I didn't need a light of my own to see my way through the field. Everything was calming and I started forgetting about all the negative thoughts trapped in my heart. Slowly my body shuting down as I fall asleep in the light of the moon.
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Hi, Abby (the author)  here. I know not about if people are reading this but I just wanted to ask if you all are okay with me writing some explicit content in this book. Like not detailed self harm situations. But like sexual situations that will be coming up. If your not comfortable with that just comment and ill make it pg-13 instead of unrated, even thought its fun to write explicit stuff. Also sorry for the shorter chapter I just need to make the story longer than what I've already written in my comp book.