Dogtag (completed)

10. awakening

Caring for Rj became very easy for Dei. He was like an infant so everything that he needed became routine-like. Dei came in the mornings and stayed with him the whole day. She took care of his personal hygiene in the morning when she arrived. Since he was fed through PEG in his abdomen, Dei only had to set up the machine at specific times of the day. During times when Rj would be resting, she tidied up in the unit or read. Sometimes, she’d read aloud to him or tell him stories about her day. She would wheel him to the park nearby so that Rj could take in some fresh air.

Nina had seen them out one afternoon. At night, she kept on bugging Dei as they prepared for bed , “Di ako makapaniwala! Bes! Destiny mo kaya yang si Faulkerson?”

“Anong pinagsasasabi mo?” Nagkataon lang siguro na magkita kami ulit dito…”

“…eh parang ganun din ang sabi mo nung nasa Sikatuna pa tayo…”

“Eh totoo naman…di naman expected na magkakilala kami nun…”

“Eh bakit ngayon? I mean, ilang months din ang nakalipas…ang dami nang nangyari sa ‘yo…sa kanya…ang dami namang facilities at ospital na makakatulong sa kanya…bakit dito pa? At bakit ikaw pa?”

“Hmm?” Dei shrugged her shoulders. “Ewan”

“Mismo!”

A storm brewed and heavy, torrential rains made it a bit difficult for Dei to arrive at Rj’s unit on time. When she finally arrived, an hour late, Rj had developed a fever from the climate change, delay in feeding, and a heavily soiled diaper. The heavy rains also brought flood to the first floor units of the complex. Dei had to arrange and assist other first floor residents to the upper floors.

“Sorry…sorry…di ako makaalis ng quarters namin agad. Ang lakas talaga ng ulan e. Tapos, ayan, baha na. Let’s get you cleaned and settled na muna…” Dei said as she prepared Rj’s things in a second floor unit, above the flood. She had tried to get everything that Rj needed, including a stuffed bear she had gifted him as a get well soon and feel better present. From the day he received the bear, he always clutched on to it even if he was expressionless still.

Rj’s skin was warm to touch when Dei began removing his pajamas prior to his morning bath. She took his temperature and confirmed a fever with a temperature of 38.6*. Instead of giving him a shower in the bathroom, she gave him a sponge bath on his bed. She put a damp towel on his forehead to help regulate his temperature as well. He fell asleep after his bath so Dei quietly arranged things in the unit to make it look similar to the downstairs unit.

The storm outside was bad. The wind howled and the rain fell heavily. Thunder and lightning rolled in the distance. Suddenly, a loud clap of thunder broke through the sound of heavy rain. Rj was startled awake and he started shouting.

“…yung mga bata! Yung mga bata! Ilayo nyo sila! Aaaaahhhh!!!”

“Shh! Shhh! You’re okay…shhh…”

“…yung mga bata…yung matatanda…may sumabog! Secure the area!”

“Oo..oo…ligtas na sila…”

“Naligtas sila?”

“Oo…naligtas sila…ligtas silang lahat…niligtas mo sila…” Dei reassured Rj as she stroked his head and patted his arm. “Ligtas na sila…” Dei said. Rj nodded and closed his eyes again.

A few hours later, as Dei adjusted his feeding machine, Rj looked at her. Dei noticed that he seemed to have focus so she smiled at him. Rj turned away and stared at the TV screen at the foot of his bed. Dei switched it on and set it to a cartoon movie. She finished her work and sat by the bed and observed Rj. He seemed to be interested in the program. To test if indeed Rj was now responsive and out of his stoic behavior, she called him.

“Sarge?”

Rj comtinued to stare at the TV.

“Rico?”

“Coach?”

Rj moved his eyes slowly toward Dei who was seated on his left side.

“Faulkerson?”

Rj side-eyed her again and his arm twitched as if to salute.

“Richard?”

Rj turned his head and looked at Dei.

“Rj?”

He continued to stare. Then, he nodded ever so slightly. Dei smiled. She said “Rj” again and he nodded slightly. Rj turned away and continued to watch TV. A few long minutes later, Dei called his name again and this time, he turned his head intentionally.

“…check ko ulit yung temperature mo tapos palitan natin yung diaper mo…”

Rj stared for a while then nodded slowly. He moved his head and relaxed his body as Dei took his temperature and changed his diaper.

As she was cleaning him, Dei noticed that Rj had tears in his eyes. Soon, he sobbed softly as she continued to diaper him. When she was done, he had closed his eyes and quieted down.

“What’s wrong? May masakit?”

With eyes closed, Rj shook his head.

“O sige, magpahinga ka na muna. I-r-ready ko lang yung feeding mo”

“…Dei? Dei…thank you for everything…for not giving up on me...ayoko na ng ganito ako…I feel na hindi lang paa ko ang nawala, pagkatao ko…I hate my life..Why does it have to be this way? Ako dapat ang nag-aalaga sa yo…promise." Dei, babalik ako…malapit na and di na ako ulit mawawala…di ako papayag”