after infinity; toby mcdonough.

CHAPTER 1

Ellie's POV:

I had just went backstage to meet 5 Seconds of Summer at their NYC show. It was awesome hanging out with them again. "Look at you! You're a little lady now," said Ashton as I walked behind the curtain. "And you still sound like a kangaroo," I said poking his cheek. "I swear, if we didn't know each other I'd assume you'd be siblings or something," said Luke. "You two are so alike."

It was sort of true. Ever since I found out how to eat Vegemite properly on buttered toast and liked it, dyed my hair a lighter shade of brown and started laughing more in my videos, people found me similar to Ashton Irwin. I put the camera on the tripod and sat on the couch in between Cake (Luke and Calum) and Mashton (Mikey and Ash). We did the 7 Second Challenge an hour before their show started, and met some fans on the VIP section. Of course, I vlogged it.

My phone buzzed a few times. There were four messages, one each from the McDonoughs and one from my mother. I checked my mom's message first, of course.

Mommy: I received your invitation to DigiFest NYC! :)

I was really stoked to see more of the people in NYC, and reunite with some of the friends I've made over YouTube. I had been talking to Jenn McAllister and Matthew Espinosa over group messages and FaceTime, and I was meeting them for the first time, which excited me a lot. Lauren from Fifth Harmony and I kept in touch, and then I found out that they were performing in DigiFest as well which made me a little excited to see her. I then checked Connor's, Riley's and Toby's messages.

Connor: WE'RE ALL ATTENDING DIGIFEST! SEE YOU IN TWO MONTHS!!

Riley: Heeeeeey see you in NYC in two months :p

Toby: See you at DigiFest, El. :)

I couldn't believe it, I was going to be reunited with these three dweebs in New York, too. We hadn't been really around at our own homes since we do so much meet and greets and gigs (well, they do gigs) and we didn't really have time for a hangout anymore. I was happy, but then I felt uneasy. I knew I should just forget Toby, but somehow I couldn't even if I moved on already. What's done was done, and I couldn't take it back, could I?

Oh, who was I kidding? Of course I missed Toby. Of course I wanted him back, even if it's just a tiny bit, and even if it's been a year. I regret my choices even if it motivated me to do whatever it was I wanted to do. Sometimes I would be so tired that when I come home to Poughkeepsie, the first thing I'd want to do was come over to the McDonoughs' and crash into Toby's arms and tell him about wherever I just got back from. Then I'd remember that they were away, at some gig or another state. You could say that even if I had the luxury now to just simply hang out with all of these fancy YouTubers and this Australian four-piece band, I was getting bad again. I needed Toby.

* * * *

I went back to the hotel approximately three hours later. My mom picked me up, and I was quiet the whole ride there. "A lot of stuff in your mind?" asked Delia. I shook my head no, even if she knew too well that there was a lot of things in my mind.

Tomorrow, we leave for Poughkeepsie. It was the first time in months that I was going home and not go anywhere until DigiFest in two months, which meant I get to catch up with the remaining months of my tenth grade. We only literally had two more months of school left, really. I've no idea when Toby will be back, but I hope I see him in the halls this week.

Two days later, there was still no sign of Toby, but I caught up with Matt and his new girlfriend named Mahogany.

"So, a YouTuber's in our presence, huh?" he said. I smiled. Ever since I uploaded a light-humored introduction video on YouTube, everybody's been acknowledging me as a YouTuber. I found it strange at first, but I had gotten used to it. "I absolutely adore your advice videos," said Mahogany. "You've seen them?" I asked, surprised that she actually sees my videos. "Everybody has, don't act so modest! You're like famous now," she said. I chuckled and shook my head. "My definition of famous is Chloe Moretz or Channing Tatum. I'm not even close," I said, which was true. I like to believe that I gained admirers because I did what I loved, just like the other people invited at DigiFest (unless, of course, you were Acacia Brinley). "That's the way, Ellie. Don't ever let that pretty little head of yours to fill up this room," said Matt. I really didn't know what to say at this point, so I changed the subject. "What about you guys? How are you two?" I asked. "Oh, I'm great," Mahogany said. "I was kinda sick a few days ago because I ate this weird sushi thing..."