The Inevitable

Chapter 14 Lies

"It's amazing with all the patience we've gained over the years, and I'm still so utterly impatient with Bella," Edward murmured.

"You seem pretty patient with her," Alice countered.

Edward rose from the couch and began pacing the living room. "I hope it appears so…to her in the very least. But I don't feel patient Alice. I feel like I'm going out of my mind."

"You know you have to go slow…"

"Of course I know that," he interrupted. "But it's just so…damn hard! These years we've spent apart…they were the slowest, most agonizing of my existence. And now that she's here, now that I have her back, it's so hard to…hold myself back."

Alice giggled. "You make it sound like you want to pounce on her."

Edward rolled his eyes. "It's not just something physical…although I won't deny that that aspect has proven to be…difficult also. I wish she would open up to me. Talk to me. Really talk to me. Bella's the only thing that has ever been a true mystery to me. From the time I first laid eyes on her."

He continued pacing. "Now she's become…one of us, and that mystery is more frustrating than ever! Now I know nothing as to how she feels. At least then she told me. Or I could read it on her face. Hear it in her heartbeat…something! I didn't know everything, but I knew much more than I do now."

"To not be able to reach out and just touch her…hold her hand, stroke her cheek…it's utter torture! Does it even appear that I'm getting any closer to…anything with her?" He looked at Alice questioningly.

"Slowly but surely she's coming out from the walls she built up around herself," Alice answered. "It's a slow process though…we can't expect anything more. None of us…except perhaps for Carlisle…know what she's been through these last years. She was completely alone. She had no one there for her. And now that she does…it's a big adjustment I'm sure."

Edward sat back on the couch, running his hand through his hair. "I know I need to be patient. I just…I want to know how she's feeling. What she's feeling. If she's feeling anything remotely…" He trailed off, heaving a big sigh.

"Edward," began Alice hesitantly. "Have you really given her a reason to open up to you?"

Edward's eyes darted to look at her. "What do you mean? I've been trying like crazy!"

"Yes. You've tried to show her you're here for her. You've tried being her friend. But if you really want her to open up to you…you need to…tell her the truth," Alice finished quietly.

"I have not lied to Bella. I've been perfectly honest with her!"

"Yes…now. But you weren't then. Are you forgetting what you told Bella the day you left her?"

Edward felt like he had been slapped across the face as the memory of that afternoon rushed into his mind.

"Ok, let's talk," Bella said firmly, though her voice shook slightly. Edward could see the panic in her eyes as he stood leaning on the tree across from her.

He took a deep breath. "Bella, we're leaving."

Bella took a deep breath too. Edward saw a little of the fear leave her eyes as she spoke. "Why now? Another year…"