The Inevitable

Chapter 15 Whatever It Takes

Edward jumped up off the couch and began pacing again. "No. No…she couldn't have thought…all this time…"

"Edward, be rational about this."

"I told her I loved her hundreds of times! I told her she was everything to me, that…"

"Edward, think about this," Alice interrupted. "Yes, you told her you loved her hundreds of times. But you told her once that you didn't love her, that you didn't want to be with her. Imagine if it were reversed. What if Bella had come to you just once and told you that she didn't love you, didn't want to be with you? Would you have believed her?"

Edward stopped pacing, looking down at the floor, and remained silent.

Alice went over and placed a hand comfortingly on his shoulder. "You would have believed her Edward. You went there that day to convince her. You did Edward. You succeeded…she bought it."

"For…for seventy five years she has thought that…that I didn't love her," he choked out.

She gave him a small smile. "You did what you did with the very best intentions. But it wasn't the right thing. And if you want to make it right…you will have to tell Bella the truth."

"All this time," he murmured.

"I do believe…that Alice is probably right," Carlisle said sadly from behind his desk.

Edward sat in a chair in front of him, his elbows resting on his knees, and ran a hand frustratingly through his hair. "I never even thought about it this way! I just…when I saw her again…when she saw me…I just thought she knew I loved her."

"Even if maybe she did believe that you still loved her then, when you left…she's had many years to convince herself otherwise. Years that have been spent alone and sad. Think about it Edward. If she did think you still loved her, and she was one of us…don't you think she would have searched us out? Looked for you? The only thing holding the two of you back when she knew you loved her was her being human. If she didn't try to find us after she was changed…it was most certainly…because she thought you…didn't want her."

He shook his head back and forth. "I thought I just needed to convince her she could trust me again. I didn't think I would need to convince her that…I love her."

Carlisle sighed, saying nothing.

"So what do I do?" he pleaded. "How do I fix this, how do I make it right?"

"You do just as Alice said…you tell her the truth."

Edward stood and began pacing. "What do I say to her? Oh, I was lying then, but I'm being truthful now? Why should she believe me?"

"She may not Edward, and that's something you need to prepare yourself for."

"How do I prepare for that? I…I can't imagine if she were to actually keep believing that I don't…care for her in that way. I can't even imagine her believing that for this long!"

"Edward…what did you believe would have happened if she remained human? Don't you think she would have gone through her life believing you didn't love her then also?"

"But this is different! She hasn't had a 'normal' life…by any means! If she had gone on being human, she would have most likely…loved, married, had children, and even if she did believe I didn't love her…it would have been different! She has been alone, and unhappy for the last seventy five years…believing the whole time that I didn't care for her!"