How To Drown Colin McKinin | ON HOLD

18. lives outside ours

C O L I N

To my own sheer surprise, I didn't jump or scream when a dark figure entered my room at around 3:00am.

Pulling the sheets further over my chest, I watched silently as the figure stalked across my room before hoisting the window up.

"Soren?" I asked quietly, wondering if my own inquiries were going to cause me trouble. I was used to my brothers sneaking out of the house through my bedroom window purely because it was linked to the drainpipe that led to an easy access outside.

But, this person was wearing a dark beanie and even darker clothes, the moonless night hiding their face. He had obviously noticed me being awake but non-the-less, not caring — probably Soren.

"Go back to sleep." Soren mumbled, his face turned away from me, his large shoulders hunched and his voice soft.

Sitting further up in bed, I watched him carefully put one leg out the window. He was being oddly calm, quiet and just gentle as a whole — that wasn't normal.

"You alright?" Running a hand through my messy hair, he paused in his the motion at the sound of my voice. "Where are you going?"

His hesitation truely alerted me of my fears, he was worried about something and Soren didn't really care for anything — something was terribly wrong.

"Nothin' it's fine. Go back to sleep." His was voice so quiet it was unnerving. We weren't close enough for me to push him and receive an answer. He was the type of person that if you pushed, you'd end up pushing yourself further away from him.

Just when I thought he would leave and I would never know did he turn around to look at me, bright blue eyes barely visible.

"Hey Buddy..." Soren looked down at his wrist — at a watch, then to me again, "I was a bit harsh in the car. I know what it's like... it's not helpful for someone to yell at you for something you already know you're doing. Also, don't dump your problems on that girl. I pushed you away from me because I'm still learning how- -"

Soren pitched the bridge of his nose and sighed , "- - how to listen and understand. No one was really there for me, which is no one's fault but I'm gonna be there for you... So, you don't turn into me."

"Fuck." He swore at his phone that was ringing loudly. It was oddly playing Beyoncé, "Just not tonight but another time."

"What's wrong?" I was half way out of bed now, stumbling towards him as he paced, before suddenly Soren climbed fully outside the window.

"Nothin'." Then he was gone, sliding down the pole and into darkness.

But I heard what he was saying into the phone as he stalked across the wet lawn and it made my stomach drop, "Jay, it'll be alright - - he won't die... I know... I'm coming."

It took a long time before I fell asleep.

-

When Robin McKinin, half naked and bruised walked down the stairs of our house around breakfast time, I choked on my cereal.

Might I add, it hurts to have cornflakes stuck in your throat. Though, I didn't choke in surprise of his bruises but rather at the colour of his hair.

It was brown.

"What the fuck-" I spluttered through choking, clambering off my chair and while heaving for air.

"Were you always such a drama queen?" Robin, the twin of myself who was completely identical with me until last night, mumbled.

"It's brown!" The words bursting out louder and more astonished then I meant it to be.