All I Have to Give

Chapter 4

The sun was shining brightly against Rachel's back as she walked across the campus to find a spot to sit down for a while. The distant chatter of fellow students was heard in the distance as she flung her backpack over her shoulder and gripped the strap to secure it in place. Rachel scowled for a moment as she stopped to look around, hoping to find a semi private location to unwind from her biology class. After an hour of listening to the monotone voice of her professor, Rachel was looking forward to sitting alone and relaxing for the next two hours. Normally, she would go back to the apartment to rest, but today she decided that staying on campus was the better option. Especially since she and Kristin hadn't spoken much in the past week. Ever since her panic attack, Kristin seemed a little distant towards her. With the exception of Backstreet Boys, they'd barely said a word to each other. Rachel couldn't decide if Kristin was annoyed or uncomfortable with her having a panic attack. Either way, it was frustrating to live in the same apartment with someone giving the cold shoulder.

Rachel sighed as she shook the thoughts of her head and settled on a spot beneath a shady tree located outside the cafeteria. The smell of burgers and fries wafted through the air as she sat down, placing her backpack in front of her. Her mouth watered a little as she realized she was hungry. The thought of french fries dipped in a ketchup and mayo mix seemed like heaven but she knew she couldn't afford to blow any of her money until she found a job. Rachel observed a group of girls who were giggling as they walked by, feeling a twinge of anxiety as she forced herself to offer a polite smile as they ignored her presence and kept walking. Rachel grimaced as she reached into her bag and pulled out a PB&J sandwich and a newspaper. Folding the paper in half, she stared intently at the job listings as she opened the sandwich bag and took a bite of her sandwich. She sighed as she chewed slowly and circled a possible job working the front desk at a hotel. The jelly from her sandwich began to drip down her finger as she read through a couple more ads. Licking the jelly off her finger, she shifted her position on the grass and creased her brow as she set the sandwich down on her backpack. Rachel slid her purple srunchie off her wrist and pulled her hair back into a bun and went back to reading the paper. As she picked up her sandwich and took another bite, a warm breeze blew past her, causing the paper to slip away from her grasp. Rachel rolled her eyes with a groan of frustration as she walked over to the bench where the paper had come to a stop. She noticed a slender figured girl sitting at the bench, talking loudly on her cell phone, obviously in a heated argument with the person on the other line. Trying to avoid being nosy, Rachel awkwardly bent down to pick up her paper, but the girl moved her foot and pressed it over the paper. Rachel glanced up at her with pleading eyes, hoping she would remove her foot from the paper without any conversation. The girl raised her voice and stomped on the paper, making Rachel jump a little and stepped away before she ended up with smashed fingers.

"Alex, I swear to God if you yell at me one more time, I'm hanging up on you!" she exclaimed. "Fuck you! If you can't talk to me in a decent tone, I'm so done with this conversation!" she continued then hung up the phone.

The girl sighed loudly and looked over at Rachel with a scowl. Her forehead wrinkled as the breeze blew her shoulder length brown hair across her face. Rachel looked at her and shifted her glance down at the paper still under the girl's foot as her stomach twisted in knots with apprehension.

"I swear that man has more issues than Times Magazine," the girl said while shaking her head. "You got a boyfriend?"

"No," Rachel said, not taking her eyes off the now wrinkled newspaper.

"Smart girl," she said with a more relaxed tone as she dug through her purse, pulling out a cigarette. "You got a light?"

Rachel looked up and watched her as she pulled random items out of her purse. "Uh...no, sorry, I don't smoke."