Slip of Tounge
I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and asked loudly, "How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blowjob? I turned around and walked back out and never went back. My husband didn't say a word... he knew better.
Secret
While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to
release some pent-up energy and ran amok. I was finally able to grab hold of her after receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other patrons. I told her that if she did not start behaving "right now" she would be
punished.
To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a voice just as threatening, "If you don't let me go right now, I will tell Grandma that
I saw you kissing Daddy's pee-pee last night!"
The silence was deafening
after this enlightening exchange. Even the tellers stopped what they
were doing. I mustered up the last of my dignity and walked out of the bank with my daughter in tow. The last thing I heard when the door closed behind me were screams of laughter.
